Dating Today: Be Interesting… But Don’t Try | 4/3/26

Keith Malinak (00:14.168)

Hey, hey, hey, welcome to this edition of At the Mic. I'm your host, Keith Malinak. I really hope you can see me, hear me, everything's good. I'll be looking forward to your thumbs up and whatnot over there. Yeah, okay, looks like it's working. Because it's just the last few times that I've gone from the countdown to the show, it's just frozen up. And then I just hope for the best and it looks like it worked out. So, good.

All right. I do want to point out something and Brad can give me crap for this later. You he does the the what the f*** Wednesday for Daily Mojo. And I was so excited when he and I when we do the Wednesday show together, we both have atomic clocks that I will never understand how atomic clocks work. But I was so excited that they were both synced up perfectly. It turns out they're no longer synced up.

And Brad, just so you know, I think yours is right because that clock now is behind the computer clock. anyway, look, I'm a nerd. I want to know how they work. And I want to know how this thing lost time. I haven't done anything to it. So anyway, welcome. And thank you if this is your first time with us. I know a lot of people like to sample the Friday live stream platter. There's also the Thursday deep dive, which yesterday

was the Jesus Discoveries with Dr. Jeremiah Johnston. Please go and see that. Everything's available at ATMshow.com. Let me get the banners off of here. I will never remember to take the banners off, apparently. ATMshow.com, thank you so much to Hero West for breaking it into four parts. We were at the Throwback Tuesdays, which features a conversation that I had many, many years ago with people about their life stories. Some fascinating stuff. Brad will be coming up, actually, soon on that. That's every Tuesday that drops.

On Wednesdays, it's a wild card Wednesday, And then Thursday's a deep dive. If you missed it, like I said, go and check it out. An awesome discussion for the Easter season, for any time, quite frankly. The historical facts around Jesus. What else I got for you? Of course, Instagram. Gabby's always over there at the Mike Show posting awesome stuff. So thank you to her as well. Great team here. Speaking of the team.

Keith Malinak (02:25.39)

know, um, I don't know that the three of us will or the four of us, should say, will ever be assembled at the same time. Five, six, seven, eight, 29, 30, 31. Yeah. 32. What? Three. I'm telling you, it's your clock for the five to 36 seconds behind you. Uh, you are not hardwired. That's what your problem is. I'm living in the past. Yeah. So many ways. So here I am.

Oh, who's that little angel on your screen? at that. Look. the little angel behind you, not her. The little angel behind you.

Rebecca Mistereggen (03:00.172)

That's the robot Jesus behind you, Brad.

Keith Malinak (03:04.669)

yeah, tell us about that and welcome Rebecca. It's been so long. It has. Honestly, when was the last time you were hanging out with?

Rebecca Mistereggen (03:12.042)

I don't even remember.

Keith Malinak (03:14.574)

before the restraining order kept me at least 500 yards away from her. If you want to, if you really want to go there, that's what. Stay a continent away, the judge said. You know, I just don't think it was harassment. That's a fine line. It is a fine line. Harassment is in the eye of the beholder. Of the offender. Huh? You like that? That's a better point. I like that point much better. Yeah. Harassment is in the eye of the offender. Mm That's that's what caught my eye originally. Hold on. Hold on a second. Hang on. That presumes guilt.

We can't we can't use the word offender. Can't use her ass either. Yeah. That implies her ass.

Rebecca Mistereggen (03:50.594)

Well, apparently that's the same for rapists because I just read an article today where the rapists said that rapists sex.

Keith Malinak (04:01.806)

sex what? You can't rape the willing first of all. Okay. is an accident.

Rebecca Mistereggen (04:07.904)

She was not willing.

Keith Malinak (04:09.24)

Okay, so here we are on a Friday and boy. with YouTube. Man, they will knock you out of the park for using the word rapé. Okay, so going forward, that's how we're going to. Rapé, yes. From this day forward, it shall be known as rapé. May I ask a question? And I don't really want you to spend too much time explaining this, Rebecca, but what compelled you to read an article about rapé?

Rebecca Mistereggen (04:33.934)

Say that again?

Keith Malinak (04:35.566)

one more time in English for the Viking. Why did you decide, you know what, I'm going to read this article about Rapé.

Rebecca Mistereggen (04:43.854)

no, I just saw the post on X. It's a trial ongoing and then the headline was, know, Rapé is also...

Keith Malinak (04:51.874)

got them. We so got them. Honestly, I don't care. I just wanted to make sure we had the opportunity to reuse Rapé so it's stuck. Many times as possible. I see we haven't seen your in quite a while. I'll let Brad take it. What I did. I'm never it never ceases to amaze me the size. And actually, it's a beautiful color of that pussy. It really is. I mean, the green eyes. Yeah.

Rebecca Mistereggen (05:20.404)

Green eyes runs in the family over here.

Keith Malinak (05:22.73)

bet it does. huh. How about Rape? We're all good. How has the cat been with the baby princess Viking?

Rebecca Mistereggen (05:33.474)

Well at first he was terrified and then he was way too curious and now he's kind of protective but back to being terrified.

Keith Malinak (05:44.478)

Huh. Wait, how, how, is he terrified? What makes you say he's terrified?

Rebecca Mistereggen (05:50.67)

Because she doesn't really control her coordination. He gets really nervous, but he likes to pet him if I help out.

Keith Malinak (06:04.312)

huh. Okay, that's good. Yeah. Well, that's good. So he hasn't tried to like sit on her face while she's trying to sleep or anything like that.

Rebecca Mistereggen (06:06.281)

very fascinated with him

Rebecca Mistereggen (06:15.806)

Not to my knowledge, but I've been very, very, very careful about it. So I'm sure that he wants to, like he's tried to speck on her quite a few times, but he knows he's not allowed. And frankly, now she, now that they're the same weight, yes, they are. and she's stronger and she can pull. He's not trying to climb her.

Keith Malinak (06:41.179)

He realizes he's got a sparring partner now.

Rebecca Mistereggen (06:45.182)

Well eventually they'll probably play together. Every time I bring a new toy for her, he's the one playing with it. What?

Keith Malinak (06:51.963)

my god.

I said, there's nothing like bringing a toy home for the fat pussy. Is the cat not fat? I mean, he's big. I shouldn't use the word big, but I was using the word fat with pH. Hey, 24 hours ago, we were talking about the resurrection of Jesus Christ on this show. This show is absolutely schizophrenic. What? We're talking about her cat. Just like my brain. What is wrong with anybody who doesn't know we're talking about her cat? There's a problem with them. So you've been traveling across Europe, right? What are you even up to?

Rebecca Mistereggen (07:25.994)

I went to Brussels for three days basically.

Keith Malinak (07:32.194)

Did you have any sprouts? hear they're really good. Yeah, they're good sprouts there, right?

Rebecca Mistereggen (07:38.038)

What now?

Keith Malinak (07:39.118)

She's been gone too long. we got her. We got her. We got them with the rap and her with the sprouts. Come on, girl. Come on. The sprout. Where do we get our sprouts from? We get them in Brussels. huh.

She's got a catch up to us. You see, she's a little rusty. She hasn't been here in a while.

Rebecca Mistereggen (08:04.63)

Is my life is, know, you know, when you, you're going to do something and you forget what you were going to get. So you need to exit the room, go back to where you are. Is my life now. This is what I do all day. And when I have the occasional opportunity to sleep, my body won't let me.

Keith Malinak (08:14.082)

Do it six times a day.

Keith Malinak (08:29.314)

Whoa, what's that all about?

Rebecca Mistereggen (08:31.928)

stress, think, and sleep deprivation. Yeah, that's exact.

Keith Malinak (08:35.374)

There's the thumbnail West created today. You see the little baby Viking princess there keeping you up while you're trying to sleep Or I would say it is instinct you Your body's not allowing you to sleep because your instinct tells you you must stay awake to protect. Yes He's got it. Yeah, look at that. See you're such a mama bear that you can't even see

Rebecca Mistereggen (08:57.582)

I am so tired. I'm so tired.

Keith Malinak (09:02.446)

mean,

Rebecca Mistereggen (09:06.112)

No, so I went on a podcast while I was in Brussels with MCC.

Keith Malinak (09:10.638)

What? You cheated on us? You're seeing other shows now. First of all, before you tell your story.

Rebecca Mistereggen (09:17.934)

British and I saw how freaking tired I'm looking. was like, I had to text my mom. was like, is this what I look like now? She was like, yeah, when you're tired. I'm tired all the time now.

Keith Malinak (09:29.986)

Everybody's got to go and find that podcast now. Hey, look at this there. Is that in every Norwegian home, like a shield and an axe, like weapons and stuff? That's just a typical Norwegian It looks like a dripping hammer. What is that? What do mean? That's a... All the way to the left. The thing at the top, like 11 o'clock position, it looks like a dripping hammer. OK.

Rebecca Mistereggen (09:51.859)

That is what our decor looks like.

Keith Malinak (09:54.446)

huh. Figured as much. Alright. We're just we we want everything to be accurate and uh and so I just wanted to run up by you there. It's all in it. Nice job, Wes. Nice job. So, I'm sorry that uh that it's been such a struggle lately. Have you tried? Have you tried? Uh let's see. Uh if you try heavy, heavy drinks. Have you tried wiping some uh Captain Morgan Spiced Rum on the gums of the babe? That might especially if when teething starts.

Rebecca Mistereggen (10:24.292)

no no, she's teething.

Keith Malinak (10:25.918)

okay. Well then, may I recommend Father of Three recommends Captain Morgan Spice Rum right here.

Rebecca Mistereggen (10:33.4)

I'm telling you, like this first period of like, it's been five months now. She's five months and a week old, right? So the first period was the tummy. And when that has resolved and she actually started eating a little bit of porridge every day. So she's all good in that department. The teething start at three months old, she started drooling and itchy. now it's just...

Keith Malinak (10:58.431)

That's me every day. Yeah. Yeah. We're we're like, hey, that sounds familiar. Yeah. He's hurt. He's hurt. It's not fun for you either.

Rebecca Mistereggen (11:03.17)

Well, she's in pain, it's not fun for her.

Rebecca Mistereggen (11:09.802)

Not at all. I love her. She is the cutest little night terror.

Keith Malinak (11:14.84)

But you can't get mad because she's so adorable. That's why they make babies.

Rebecca Mistereggen (11:19.566)

We would leave them in the ditch. Yes

Keith Malinak (11:21.812)

Exactly. My god made baby's cute because otherwise it all will get abandoned. Yeah. Yeah. That's I really hope things get better. I hope you get some rest. Yeah, they will. I'm sorry.

Rebecca Mistereggen (11:35.138)

Well, now I'm in existential crisis. I'm like...

Keith Malinak (11:39.682)

What? What's from? Hello, what's going on? What's that about? What's that now?

Rebecca Mistereggen (11:47.576)

Teeth and poop is my life now and forgetting stuff and putting stuff where it doesn't belong.

Keith Malinak (11:53.006)

Welcome to your sixties. Just sit that anywhere, Keith. I'm trying to grab Beavis here because you started talking about poop and cornhole. You need to make an appearance. you saying that the all of the fun and frivolity and excitement of Ute is is being yanked out of your grasp?

Rebecca Mistereggen (12:13.866)

It has been pulled out of my every cell before birthing this child. And now she's eating what's ever left over.

Keith Malinak (12:23.022)

Oh, all right. It gets better in about 18 years. Go back to that part where you were like, you know, talking about poop and stuff, you know, that's kind of funny. Holy. Okay. Well, you know what? Well, let's have some fun today. What do you think? In fact, I've got a baby. Uh, I almost said baby. You have a baby, a mama baby tip for you here, uh, that might help you out. Just a tip for, uh, for Rebecca here. And it's the, something about a microwave here. Now, I don't know about you, Rebecca, with your situation.

I don't know if the baby sleeps well when she does fall asleep or I guess soundly. In other words, sound disturb the child? Like, you know, like if you got like a, if a beep or something off in the distance, like is she a heavy sleeper once she falls asleep or a light sleeper what? What do we got? It depends. Okay. Okay. You're wearing depends now? Okay. Not yet. No, those are handy.

Rebecca Mistereggen (13:15.426)

depends.

Keith Malinak (13:20.576)

No. OK, so the reason I ask is because, did you ever, did you ever try the Ferber method? I told you about this. Hand on this.

Rebecca Mistereggen (13:28.686)

I'm telling you, she sleeps very well. Usually, if she's in a good place, she just falls asleep. But when she's now teething, my sigh can wake her.

Keith Malinak (13:37.872)

huh. Yeah. gotcha.

Oh yeah, okay. So this this video here is like a it's a tip about uh about the microwave whiskey. He's right. You mean to tell me this whole time I've been yelling at my husband not to touch the microwave because the kids are gonna wake up and I could have just pressed zero and held it down. Look at that. And it literally mutes it. It mutes it. What? What? Is that real?

Keith Malinak (14:11.47)

You came up on the screen there. Look at that. I mean, who has 30 seconds? Look at that!

Keith Malinak (14:20.82)

I was eight years old when I learned that one. Right!

Rebecca Mistereggen (14:25.998)

I don't have one anymore.

Keith Malinak (14:29.806)

We'll throw in Norway.

Rebecca Mistereggen (14:32.258)

Because it kills your food. It's not good.

Keith Malinak (14:36.603)

Okay, Robert Kennedy Jr. joining us on the program today.

Rebecca Mistereggen (14:40.856)

No, I'm telling you, we did an experiment. We put water in the microwave and then use that water to water a plant, two identical plants. Okay?

Keith Malinak (14:53.735)

no, tell me more. I'm into this kind of stuff. Let's go.

Rebecca Mistereggen (14:57.644)

The plant died, the one with the microwave water. So I decided I don't want the microwave anymore.

Keith Malinak (15:06.094)

Wait, did you let it cool down first or did you pour boiling hot on it? He cracked the code!

Rebecca Mistereggen (15:16.8)

It was not hot, no.

Keith Malinak (15:18.798)

Not as hot as me.

Rebecca Mistereggen (15:21.408)

I use an air fryer now.

Keith Malinak (15:23.15)

See when I start eating these little chewy bars that's a good time for you to just start ranting about whatever you want to because I'll be chewing the same bite for 20 minutes man this is is poor planning I finally brought food up here but it's the chewiest damn things ever made.

Rebecca Mistereggen (15:41.038)

I just want to answer Jeffy because yes, I do want 10 more actually. I wish I started when I was 28 and I could have 10 more children and also that I actually had a man to have kids with and someone to help me out so I actually could get some sleep, but that's not my case. I'm old and I have one child and no man.

Keith Malinak (16:01.97)

Boy, are you going to get the offers now? Yeah. Yeah. They're going to come rolling in and her address is 1213. Just show up. She loves it when people just show up at her house.

Rebecca Mistereggen (16:14.338)

I do not. I am not a people person.

Keith Malinak (16:17.304)

So this is going to make it rough. Are you familiar with Mary Lisa?

I'll find you know.

Rebecca Mistereggen (16:25.838)

But I'll tell you what, I am an introverted person. do not like if you're extroverted, we cannot have a relationship. It's horrible. Something needs to happen all the time. Just chill the fuck out. How hard is it to sit down for one day and not do anything?

Keith Malinak (16:43.394)

Wow. Have you checked the mirror lately? Really good. Have you checked? mean, just saying it's, seems like nothing. I'm not saying anything. am not incurring anything. I'm just saying that, if you're Keith, you know who Mary Lisa is, right? I do not. Mary Lisa is she's there on the screen. This chick lives in, in, San Francisco. She has had this website up. She's put billboards up.

Rebecca Mistereggen (16:49.887)

What are you saying?

Rebecca Mistereggen (17:01.174)

no

Keith Malinak (17:11.47)

She has been looking for a man for months and she can't, she's had a, what is it? A 30, you'll see, uh, she received 3,800 applications between September last year and October. And I mean, it's always in the eyes because yep, right there. But, uh, she can't find the right guy. So all I'm saying is, uh, Rebecca do not be Lisa.

Rebecca Mistereggen (17:38.31)

I am not Lisa and I'll you what, Brad, I am not even interested in dating. All my energy goes into this child. just speaking from the experiences that I've had with like extroverted charming men.

is that they suck the life force out of you and they need attention all the time. And I don't have time for that shit. Like if you want to date me, you're going to have to number one, be introverted, number two, funny. And you're going to have to add to my life, not take away from it. And I'm not going to go out there looking for you either. And probably you will not be looking for me because you're introverted. So here we are.

Keith Malinak (18:15.47)

Oh, it's a paradox. See that? So you need to be a funny introvert who gives more than he takes.

Rebecca Mistereggen (18:23.694)

Not necessarily give more than he takes just that

Keith Malinak (18:27.81)

This guy right here. See, he's the introvert. should.

Rebecca Mistereggen (18:30.478)

It's balanced Keith, like you give and you take and you don't overtake.

Keith Malinak (18:37.47)

know, a male standpoint, the perfect woman is about three and a half tall, three and a half feet tall with a flat head. She's deaf, mute, and her father owns a liquor store. But you know, we're not picky either. Hey, did you see the new addition back here? We're one full show without a dog barking in the background. I'm kind of proud of that though. One day. he's right here.

Rebecca Mistereggen (18:38.24)

It's super picky.

Rebecca Mistereggen (19:05.262)

What you

Keith Malinak (19:05.73)

Amazing. don't have any food. He saw me eating.

Rebecca Mistereggen (19:08.908)

My cat's licking his bum.

Keith Malinak (19:13.23)

A different choice of snack on your end, Okay, so all right, we'll try the microwave. I'm sorry. You don't have one. So nevermind.

Rebecca Mistereggen (19:25.902)

Besides, have this app called Napper, which has saved my life so many times. I cannot tell you. If you have a little child, you're trying to get to sleep, get Napper.

Keith Malinak (19:36.724)

All the songs you could download and they're all free and that was yeah, right, right that kid

Rebecca Mistereggen (19:41.87)

I put on a washing machine sound for her. It runs for two hours, washing machine.

Keith Malinak (19:48.11)

She's young, Keith. She doesn't know about. She doesn't know about. You don't know about Napster. Remember Napster? So, so you started having kids at 29, right? And you you just said you wish you had started having them at 28. I mean, that's fine. You'll get. You're so old. So, hey, maybe you need to get a a pet raven, huh? Those things are smart. They are smart. Look at this.

Keith Malinak (20:14.958)

Well, first of all, what is it? mean, because it looks like a severed finger. It was a shrimp, think. OK. right. So the Ravens like, I got this. got this. I need to find a tool first. Huh? This guy. All right. He's got to find something. I got it. Let me let me go into my working shed and find me a tool. Severed fingers on the other. Oh, he needed a straighter one. At first, it was gay. That first thing was so. Right. Look at this guy.

Rebecca Mistereggen (20:40.073)

I wasn't.

Keith Malinak (20:44.588)

You want a stick or a bird? do you... Bird.

Rebecca Mistereggen (20:47.982)

A stick is easy. Yes, it really is bad. Sticks are easy and they just don't, you know, yeah.

Keith Malinak (20:49.934)

Look

Keith Malinak (20:57.262)

This is that man that's welcome to Friday. Look at this guy. Look, he's like dang it, But then. Sorry, that's it. That's as deep as it goes. That stupid bird right there. He can't figure out that he needs to get rid of the other stuff. You're dumb. What a stupid animal. Wow. I got to clip off a little extra branch. I get to work with you little Raven. If he comes back with a pair of pruners.

Rebecca Mistereggen (21:04.898)

There's two men, there's a bird like that.

Keith Malinak (21:27.662)

doing bro stop now you're embarrassing yourself thank you all right now he's now he's realizing i gotta get this thing out of here and they talk that's the freaky thing they talk

Rebecca Mistereggen (21:41.243)

my god, I saw this story about a parrot, parakeet, parrot that was left in a basement.

Keith Malinak (21:49.614)

You have some pliers in here? Come on now. Sorry, go ahead. What? look at him!

Rebecca Mistereggen (21:53.646)

then it was best friend with the newborn baby and it was the cutest story ever and maybe

Keith Malinak (21:59.63)

Oh, hang on a second. Yeah, we're too busy watching this. No, because I want to hear if he gets. He's going to the severed finger. Yeah, now that's gross. See all for a severed finger. What was your little story? Yeah, wait.

Rebecca Mistereggen (22:12.686)

about a parrot that was a rescue parrot apparently been alone in a basement in the dark for like I don't know how long and then this lady took it in and then she was pregnant and she gave birth to her baby and the parrot was very protective of the baby and they became best friends and it was the cutest little story ever and I cried and then I read the comments and then I read that the parrot had died.

Keith Malinak (22:36.611)

thought you were going say... to Highly Entertaining and Uplifting Stories on Friday Afternoon. I thought you were going to say, it turned out it was AI!

Rebecca Mistereggen (22:43.998)

No, no, no, this is a real story. It's so freaking cute. it's really cute,

Keith Malinak (22:48.11)

Is it cute or sad? now I'm too... It went from depressing as hell to cute as... I'll get out. Depressing as... He died. Wow. So did he get more time in the dark or more time with the baby friendship? All right, that's good. Well, why don't you send that to me and maybe it'll make an... I'm finding out... have a bird story too. Yeah, well, save your bird story. I want you to be impressed by this Border Collie here. Watch this.

Rebecca Mistereggen (22:55.95)

Have a good life at the end of

Rebecca Mistereggen (23:03.522)

Baby French.

Rebecca Mistereggen (23:07.95)

Let me see if I can find it.

Keith Malinak (23:17.422)

See that? Okay, so here's what we're doing. We just took ballpoint pen. All right, we just rubbed Wait, who wrote it? Who was using the ballpoint pen? The border college? The cameraman. The cameraman. Okay, the cameraman. All right, so now watch this. We're gonna take the pen and we're gonna chuck it out in the field, all right? All right, he's pointing the at Why would you throw away a good pen? Just relax for a second. So he's gonna walk over here to a dog that is out of sight. The dog didn't see it.

Smell that, smell that pen. Smell my pen. Smell the ink. Smell my pen. Go find it. Go get it. Look at this. I mean, this is amazing.

Rebecca Mistereggen (23:57.778)

Yes, Kara, his name was Feather. I have it right here, actually. I'll put it in the right...

Keith Malinak (24:04.206)

you know what that dog and find that damn although that was a bit of a foreshadowing by showing us the pen and then throwing the pen and then going and finding a dog. Well, he had to get a scent there, you know, and make it makes sense. you think he's going to find it? It makes sense. If it if he doesn't find it, I'm I'm quitting. If he doesn't find it, I'm leaving. Well, that would be a stupid waste of time. What a dumb dog.

Look at him, he's like, come on. What we doing? come on, the gate? This is shameful! This is shameful! You know what, why don't you go find a severed finger in a pipe? I'll tell you-

Rebecca Mistereggen (24:41.694)

Better border collie story.

Keith Malinak (24:43.886)

would have found it by now. huh. huh. A cat would have brought it back with a note. Look. Dang, if you want your pen back, I want 20 bucks. Look at this, huh? What's happening? You think he found it or do you think he just decided to lay down? He found the duplicate pen that was mounted in was inside a mound of of of cheeseburgers. Good boy. He didn't even bring it back. Yeah, right? What a lazy dog.

Right? Somebody had to say that. I'm glad you did. You're so lazy. All he did. Look, hey, I found your pen. It's over here. Come look. Come get it. Come get it.

Rebecca Mistereggen (25:20.718)

I'm gonna do an admission. I saw this video on X. I saw the beginning and then when he didn't find the pen within the first seconds, I scrolled.

Keith Malinak (25:30.508)

You are so short of that the single guys in the chat were hoping to hear, but we got something at least. right. Whatever.

Rebecca Mistereggen (25:37.55)

I sent you this the parrot thing in the private chat key

Keith Malinak (25:41.71)

you all the guys listening, watching right now for just $9.95 a month, Rebecca will tell you her true confessions. I've $9.95 a month. $99.95 a month. Checks payable to one real Brad Stead. Yep. Yep. Just send him here.

Rebecca Mistereggen (25:58.894)

I had a real good scare in my Norix the other morning and that will be one of those stories.

Keith Malinak (26:05.708)

You okay, I don't know. No, I'm not gonna I'm not gonna ask. I'm gonna Yeah, I am. No, let's just say no, no, no, no, let's just let's just see who can let's just see. Say that one more time. Can you said you had a scare with them or about them or over them?

Rebecca Mistereggen (26:20.532)

With them. I had a scare with my north.

Keith Malinak (26:23.422)

We call those a nork scare. Right, it's kind of like a jump scare.

Rebecca Mistereggen (26:29.12)

terrified.

Keith Malinak (26:31.694)

Well, now I'm really intrigued because I've never seen Norks. Oh, look, a cute baby video with a parrot. That's weird. Are there Norks in it, Oh, that's cute. Look at She's got the auntie. Oh, look at that. That's a cute little. was like a babysitter, sometimes even like a real mother. Isn't that sad, that little past tense? Feather was like a babysitter. Oh, that's the parrot. The way she always stayed close to her gentle and patient made me feel as if Feather truly believed Sophia was her.

Rebecca Mistereggen (26:54.936)

Yeah.

Keith Malinak (27:01.176)

Okay, we gotta talk about animal pet names. Okay? Okay. Feather? Feather. Kevin. Feather. Let's call the bird Kevin. Kevin. All right, that's much better. Thank you. Baby. Sophia stirred or started to cry, Kevin. Feather was always the first to show up, as if she didn't want to miss a single moment of that little girl's life. That's so cute. Kevin. Say it. Kevin would. Kevin.

Where's the sad story? Where's the sad part? I don't get the sad parts!

Rebecca Mistereggen (27:33.339)

You don't get the sad part in there. Well, you do. Yeah, you do get the whole like rescue thing, but I'm not sure.

Keith Malinak (27:39.956)

here we go. to look beyond the initial difficulties. Yes, it will take time. Yes, it will require patience. OK, I don't know what we're talking about now. That's cute. That's really very cute. Yeah. And so what left Kevin in the basement? I have a bird story.

Rebecca Mistereggen (27:51.768)

But how cute is that?

Keith Malinak (28:02.304)

Alright, well I guess we'll to-

Rebecca Mistereggen (28:03.406)

I have a bird story too.

Keith Malinak (28:07.214)

Go ahead. Tell me your birds. No, mine's more of a visual. saw the it was two birds that I saw this morning when I was out running and I just I pulled out my uh what were you running a camera of people were chasing me and I saw these two birds and I thought I wonder what the birds are doing. No, no. And um no, no. What? Is that this morning? Yeah. And so I just I was like, hey, what are you guys doing up there? And so it's a crow and a vulture and um

They're eating something. They're they're known, but the vulture, he ran that poor that poor crow off. They are. And can you imagine if your life consisted of smelling for dead things and then eating them? I mean, really, that would be a really horrible existence. I like how that crow's got some balls. That's exactly what I thought this morning, too. I'm like, damn, that thing is twice his size. It wasn't afraid of the bird. It was afraid of you.

Yes, that's exactly what happened. I got up and I didn't even really scare it. just finally went, OK, I don't trust you behind me, which is probably wise of the how many times people thought that about you. Right. See, it's always I can get them the first time, but the second time I really have to work at it. But vultures in packs are giant pussies. They really are. They're they're they're scary cats. I feel like they're work crews, you know, if you're driving on the road.

and you see like a half a dozen of them bouncing around something dead and one of them's picking at it and the other five are just like, what's going on over there? It's the same thing with like a road crew. It's like one guy's doing the work and five of are leaning on shovels looking around like, well, did you clock in? You clocked in, okay, well. But you'd think they'd be badass because they're so big. I mean, that was a big bird. Not the big bird, a big bird. And they just, they're not, they're not a badass at all. just, they run.

Let me show some love here to the...

Rebecca Mistereggen (29:57.996)

They're garbage men.

Keith Malinak (30:00.16)

somebody's gotta do it. Look at that. Huh? E guru. Find a garbage man. Forensic dogs are trained not to mess with the evidence. See? He is smart. smelly one guru's big brain now, huh? You trying to show off? He's trying to get in on the he's getting in line for you, For geniuses. Wishing everybody a happy Easter in there. And what did you that that picture behind you there?

What's going on on the wall back there? That's not today's thumbnail for At the Mic. No, it wasn't because it was in the wrong aspect ratio. I didn't have time. this was a. This is honest. Well, I just I didn't have time to do the other one. the. I had a I do the am I just sharing thing and just go away? don't see your sharing thing.

I don't like it when my sharing thing disappears. Hold on a second. why, did I just get your sharing thing back up? I'm going to get my sharing thing back up. But, um, it was, uh, there we go. That one right there. the zoom B, uh, there it is right there. There's the thumbnail, but I went to AI and I thought, know, wouldn't it be fascinating? Because if you think about today, uh, uh, this is the day that, uh, Christ was, was, uh, crucified.

And it is Good Friday. Good Friday originally meant Holy. So Holy Friday. And then you think about all of the people out there who are protesting. And I thought, that's the ultimate free. If you think about there's a great juxtaposition of somebody dying for your sins. And then you're out there whining, moaning and complaining on that same day, you know, out there sinning. I mean, I do it well, Yeah, that's true. You do. You do. We all do.

We all do. So this is the DailyMojo.com thumbnail Rumble channel, yes. I should have gone to the website, but I went to Rumble because it was easier there. So you got the trans flags and the rainbow flags. That's fun. But more importantly, the fact that you can create anything at a moment's notice now. Yeah. It's really kind of scary. you can, any scene you can imagine,

Keith Malinak (32:18.08)

it can be visualized in digital space in what? 30 seconds? Honestly, it's like fire. It's like the internet. There's so much good. Yeah, there's so much. But look at that. You tell me that's not real. mean, that is exactly what happens. Wes use to do those? Magic? Does he use magic? Because I was wondering about it. it looks like magic. follow him on X at second floor Dallas. And then you might see some

the magic that he creates. As a of fact, I do. that was a great way just to work his magic right into that conversation. We are masters. It's 2,300. 2,300. Your clock's more screwed up than mine, Rebecca.

Rebecca Mistereggen (33:02.912)

No, it's not exactly like it should be.

Keith Malinak (33:06.228)

I don't want to talk like this now every time. maybe it's 11 p.m. Maybe this is military time.

Rebecca Mistereggen (33:12.622)

Well you know Brad, I don't want to wake my baby up because then I'll have to leave so I'm just trying to be a little bit quiet.

Keith Malinak (33:20.94)

Thank you. bro. Hold on, let me relax first.

Keith Malinak (33:29.694)

Asthma. I like to refer to his asthma. Yeah. Now I'm taking off his shoes. I'm rubbing your big toe. yeah.

Rebecca Mistereggen (33:41.953)

You wanna see my feet?

Keith Malinak (33:44.366)

Yesterday on After Mike, we talked about Jesus Christ.

Rebecca Mistereggen (33:54.264)

I knew that would break it up.

Keith Malinak (33:55.7)

Yep. That does it. All right. Somebody make me a sandwich. I'm done now.

Rebecca Mistereggen (34:01.144)

and just went

stick over.

Keith Malinak (34:05.688)

you what this would be a good time for me to get the next video ready but unfortunately you were too entertained you you were following the entertainment too closely and you forgot to do your job didn't you Keith go ahead and admit it that's fair that's fair no it was a ups driver who got chased by a bunch of turkeys it made me laugh so i was like yeah i'm bringing that to the turkeys yeah so but i can't find it now so

Rebecca Mistereggen (34:30.766)

In fact, we call Good Friday Long Friday. We call it Long Friday.

Keith Malinak (34:36.366)

Why is it?

Rebecca Mistereggen (34:38.55)

because it was Jesus's longest day.

Keith Malinak (34:42.05)

Yeah, okay.

Rebecca Mistereggen (34:43.221)

because of the suffering. That's why we call it long.

Keith Malinak (34:46.528)

All right, interesting. mean, I mean, OK, well, maybe I'll start.

Rebecca Mistereggen (34:52.141)

I did not slip a sin. I slipped a loop. I don't do sin

Keith Malinak (35:12.014)

can't hear them. you need to hear them? No, but I mean it helps. Alright, well fine. Let me I've got it over here if you want it. Back up. See this guy's trying to deliver packages. Get out of my truck. Turkey. look at him chasing him. That's funny. What is wrong with those turkeys? They're rabid turkeys. Now he's gotta come down. Watch this. How's he gonna get past him?

I don't know, they have huge peckers too. will mess you up. They got like little dangly things too, right? Yeah, they got the dangly things in the huge peckers. You just don't want to mess with What's he gonna do? Look, he's trapped. What do you do? Smack him in the pecker. You need a distraction.

Rebecca Mistereggen (35:56.334)

I mean, big birds are kind of terrifying.

Keith Malinak (35:59.254)

Yes they are, like ostrich.

Rebecca Mistereggen (36:02.35)

and swans.

Keith Malinak (36:04.942)

Are swans really dicks? Because I've heard that they are. Yeah, they're pretentious, aren't they? Yes. Just because they get a story written about them somewhere in history, they decide that they are all that in a bag of chips.

Rebecca Mistereggen (36:17.084)

They're terrifying.

Keith Malinak (36:18.104)

They have a lake named after them. They have a ballet named after them.

Rebecca Mistereggen (36:24.622)

I really want to be a ballerina. I think I'm gonna force my dream on my child.

Keith Malinak (36:29.39)

You can do it. Oh, yeah. That's always great. It always works out when you live vicariously to your kids and you make them do what you want to do. Check this out. I'm sorry. I had to share this. Pretty cool. It's not really an animal video per se. It's not even a video. But listen to this. Scientists have discovered that ants after collecting grains and seeds, which they need to store for the winter, actually break them into halves before storing in their nests. That's because breaking the seeds in the has stops them from germinating.

despite the most perfect conditions. here comes the even more interesting part. Scientists were stunned when they discovered that coriander seeds stored in the ant nest were always broken down into four pieces instead of two pieces. After some lab research, scientists discovered that a coriander seed is the only seed that can germinate even after being divided into two, but cannot germinate after it's divided into four. That's great story. them middle part one more time. What was the middle part? The seed that broken half. Oh, OK, that's right. Yeah. But I mean, look, I mean,

animals, They're smart. We saw the dog. We saw the bird. We saw the ants. I mean, the turkeys, guess, are the here's the this is the weird thing because you brought up birds and now ants and look what else this morning that I took that I took a video of you got ants. Let's see. I have I don't I think this is just a weird bit of synchronicity that I just happened to stop and take a video of as they were doing their ant thing and stuff. Look at that, man. They're picking up little pieces of dirt and whatnot.

And that's all they do is they that's all all deal and you know why they do it to please some woman

They all think they're gonna be the chosen one. Yeah, they all think.

Rebecca Mistereggen (38:05.102)

that as well but that has changed now they spend time self tanning and plucking their eyebrows and what do you call it looks maximizing or some shit

Keith Malinak (38:14.158)

right yes looks maxing what

Rebecca Mistereggen (38:18.046)

Yeah, it's like the weird thing that I wouldn't say men, I say boys.

Keith Malinak (38:23.822)

Okay, is involved in looks, maxing?

Rebecca Mistereggen (38:28.52)

Defining your jawline and like doing weird shit and putting it on TikTok and try to look all masculine while being spending more time in the bathroom than your, I guess, boyfriend.

Keith Malinak (38:42.222)

Well, it's not just gay men who do it, but put the put this video back. I want to show you something real quick while you're talking about looks magic. Look at right. Look at right here. This coming up over this. Look at what he's carrying. That guy's a badass. Look at how big that it's like if a human was doing that, it's like the equivalent of like a car. Right. That's what they do. Like they can lift like something times their body weight. You know? Yeah. I mean, if they were if they were people size, they would be terrified.

they really are because those are fire ants and they will sting and so after this video I wiped them all out I eradicated them they're all dead now you're like let me get some good video for the show before they ask you're all dead by the way have a nice night yeah I mean I made it to April 3rd so far with zero fire ant bites on the season so I'm proud of myself that's good my first

Rebecca Mistereggen (39:35.539)

I had something interesting to show but I only have like my phone's full of baby. Hold on baby

Keith Malinak (39:42.104)

Hold on, Brad. Okay. All right. I'm not gonna say it. I'm not. I'll take this. I wanna quote you, Rebecca. Quote, I wish I had something interesting to show, end quote. Welcome to the Friday livestream, kids. Hey, so, let's see. you know. Millions.

Rebecca Mistereggen (40:01.966)

wanna see my weird bellybutton now, cause this-

Keith Malinak (40:04.259)

And we have millions of dollars. No. Millions. No, it's feet and belly buttons. No, thank you. That's even easier.

Rebecca Mistereggen (40:12.674)

Skin is kind of like started to come together and it makes this like little weird

Keith Malinak (40:18.958)

Hold on. Have you ever tried rubbing a spiced rum on your baby's teeth? Huh? You ever tried that? No. That's not what I thought you were going to say rubbing it on.

Brad Staggs (40:37.666)

Bye.

Rebecca Mistereggen (40:38.926)

They are pedicured and beautiful and soft. I can show you,

Keith Malinak (40:45.006)

I don't even care. I don't really just don't. I mean, I'm not going to like go vomit if you show them to me, but I just really don't care. No, wants to see that. don't know. Actually, there probably are some freaks in the chat that do. I guarantee you someone is out there right now salivating over the thought of Rebecca showing her feet on camera. That is one thing I don't understand. Never will. will. Nope. I will take that camera off.

Rebecca Mistereggen (41:07.18)

Well, if you see my baby's feet, will find them adorable.

Keith Malinak (41:10.658)

baby feet. That's different. Yes. Like at what age are feet no longer adorable? Like what? Four? Three? Yes. Yeah. As soon as they start walking, forget it. Yeah. So as long as they're like a crib at the once they can walk. No, don't. Once they get corns and bunions. Yes. Thank you. No longer interested. Yes. Hang on a second. Why haven't we heard more about this Barksdale Air Force Base drone?

Brad Staggs (41:31.584)

Okay, so.

Keith Malinak (41:38.382)

incursion over the course of a week every night. Does anybody know this? This is the most under reported story. Yep. And I it hasn't even made it to Norway. Rebecca, we have an Air Force base here in Louisiana, USA. And over the course of a week, every night, are 12 to 15 drones were flying over the base. And it's a little concerning. And I'd kind of like to know whose drones they are and come and get them. Because I don't like it. Brad, what do you think? But why? Why don't you like it?

because our most important parts of this country are being infiltrated by who knows who do you think is running those drones? Is it just a hobbyist there in Louisiana that, hey, let's go and see how we can get away with it. Because when you take a drone up, it says you're in airspace, you're in FAA restricted airspace near an airport. So why didn't they just shut them down?

Brad Staggs (42:17.006)

Who

Rebecca Mistereggen (42:33.702)

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait,

Keith Malinak (42:45.996)

Look, if America can survive Joe Biden, American can survive anything. Thank you. I mean, that's just it. There's a quote from one of the generals there. Far more sophisticated than anything seen in Ukraine and well beyond Iranian capability. That's a low bar. Wait, okay. Well, but time out. And I don't know. The Iranian capability. We keep being told how decimated we have decimated.

Rebecca Mistereggen (42:50.591)

Exactly.

Rebecca Mistereggen (43:12.286)

just an old guy with a mic is saying it. It was a, it was Qatar running those drones.

Keith Malinak (43:20.718)

That wouldn't surprise me. Nothing would surprise

Rebecca Mistereggen (43:23.028)

He says it, but he doesn't say it, but he says it. A hobbyist named Ahmed was running the

Keith Malinak (43:30.478)

Hey, let me just check here. Price of oil holding steady today at 112 a barrel. Jeff, Not Fox or Ahmed the the the hobbyist. Jeff Dunn Dunham. Dunham. Jeff Dunham. Jeff Dunham. thinking of Jeff Fox where they wouldn't hear you. I kill you. You're familiar with him, right, Rebecca? Okay, good.

Rebecca Mistereggen (43:57.058)

I actually was in the middle of making a really good satire a couple of years back, but then

Rebecca Mistereggen (44:07.744)

It would be very controversial.

Keith Malinak (44:10.964)

Whoa, I bet you shied away from that, didn't you?

Rebecca Mistereggen (44:14.124)

I usually don't, but you know the Teletubbies?

Keith Malinak (44:16.994)

Yes. The most twisted kid show ever invented for television.

Rebecca Mistereggen (44:21.198)

If you met Mohammed the son and everybody just blows up.

Keith Malinak (44:27.064)

Can you carry in Norway?

Rebecca Mistereggen (44:31.084)

What?

Keith Malinak (44:31.862)

You carry guns in Norway. What's the- what is your Silence! I kill you!

Rebecca Mistereggen (44:39.426)

What restrictions?

Keith Malinak (44:42.466)

You've been away too long. I'm afraid we're gonna have to reset you. So I so you can't have guns. Perfect. In Sweden slash Norway. You can. Yeah. can you get one those over there?

Rebecca Mistereggen (44:48.365)

I'm done now.

Rebecca Mistereggen (44:59.438)

You can take your hunting license and get that, or you can join a shooting club and then you have to go a certain times a month and then you can eventually acquire them, but you cannot keep ammunition and gun together and you cannot carry.

Keith Malinak (45:16.206)

What? That would be crazy. I was about to say, ha ha, your country's being overrun by Islam, you nests. Oh, wait. No, that would be us, too. And we're armed. I don't quite follow. Hey, and you think with the price of oil, I mean, you think we're about to have some energy rations, lockdowns coming back? Raise your hand if you think we're going to have societal lockdowns at some point based on price of energy and whatnot.

Why would we have a lockdown because of energy? It's going to become too costly. We're going to have to work from home again because people need to save money.

Rebecca Mistereggen (45:53.102)

Well, that's just stupid. See, this is what I don't understand about the I understand that the mainstream media does this, but I don't understand like normal thinking, rational people being like, my God, Trump close to what is called hormones, hormones.

Keith Malinak (46:10.472)

straight of hormones the gaze of hormones the gaze of hormones

Rebecca Mistereggen (46:13.282)

The gays of Hormuz. And it's going to ruin the world. Well, you have Argentina. He did do the whole Venezuela thing. know, like Norway has tons of oil. Even Britain is looking to look for oil again. What has he done? He's kind of eliminated the Arabic countries, which has been giving way too much power over their oil industry in this world. He's kind of like made them go away a little bit.

at the time being. then the West is actually growing their oil industry again, which is a good thing, which makes America more powerful, which is the end goal of Trump, which is also making the West more powerful and taking away the terrorist Islamic crap that we've been putting up with for years. So, and the French.

Keith Malinak (47:00.846)

What is fascinating is he's making a lot of these Gulf states closer allies than NATO, which is shocking to see. But here's why I'm concerned. I'd like to point out that Rebecca just terrified most husband material out there right now just by speaking and being smart. You just terrified like 90 % of the guys. So the available poll is now shrunk considerably.

I just want to say this real quick because I lost so much faith in humanity during COVID that now... now... Yup, just right now. I just now lost my faith in humanity. You got it. No, I lost my faith in humanity over how compliant people were over COVID on some of the most ridiculous things that I could see them getting convinced again over something like that. I don't know. just, feel like...

I don't know, man. I feel like... It was a good advertising campaign. I don't know. I just think that it's not gonna take much, whether it's another virus, whether it's the cost of energy, and maybe we're gonna have alternating driving days based on your license plate. I don't know. I'm very concerned about the manipulation.

Rebecca Mistereggen (48:16.558)

still doing like this whole like climate change bullshit so if anything lockdown is coming they're gonna do it on climate because they can't really lock down because of oil because they all wanted the oil gone now they're gonna get you know like

Keith Malinak (48:30.87)

wish. Hey, let's congratulate this young couple. They're about to get married here. This is exciting here. And so they're calling one of his buddies to tell them the good news that they got engaged. hang on, hang on. Let's refresh this. Come on. I hate the way Instagram works. can't do anything. I know you can't queue anything up. And he's saying to his buddy, Tiffany is no longer my girlfriend because guess what? She's not my fiance.

My girlfriend. Thank God, dude. That woman was the craziest person I've ever met. hold up, hold up, hold up. She's actually, we're engaged now. She's my fiance. She's no longer my girlfriend. She's my fiance. What the hell, Mike? I am so sorry. I cheated on you. I don't know if that's staged or what, but that's awesome. Wait, you think that's real? I love it. I want it to be real so badly. Come on now. That's funny.

That's never happened.

But you decide. What happened?

Rebecca Mistereggen (49:36.974)

I mean, women do that. Like, oh my God, you should break up with him and then you break up with him and they're like, oh my God, that's so good, you got rid of him and then you get back together and it's all awkward.

Keith Malinak (49:47.662)

See, that's why you shouldn't talk to your parents and your friends about your relationship problems because...

Rebecca Mistereggen (49:54.228)

You know what, when I talk to my my parents or my friends about my relationship problems, it's just then it's it's over. It's just like the that's just like a push to like get them out.

Keith Malinak (50:08.052)

Like a flush, like an internal flush.

Rebecca Mistereggen (50:10.38)

Yeah, because you're never bringing them back. Like you opened it up like done.

Keith Malinak (50:13.646)

Isn't it verbal bidet? It'd a verbal bidet. You know, the really cool thing about Brad Staggs, one of the so many cool things about him is how good he is around the house and doing, you know, shit up. I'm really good at that part. You're good at fixing things. good at half of that, yeah. Like you're good at making like, you know, secret passageways and whatnot, stuff like that. And so you can't hear him scream. When the cops come.

right. They'll never find me back here. Always. So, I I I think this is some fun uh tips now. I don't know what fun what the landlord taught me this. Hang on. Oh, okay. Look at it. Lord. There's toilet paper. One person need. that? Okay. Now, what's this? Wait, what is this here? So, you don't F up your wall.

is awesome, man. Look at that. That's gay. What mean it's gay? That's genius. That's not gay. That's gay, That's gay. How's that That doesn't work. Does it? It depends on how much weight. Then you make your trash can out Wait a minute. Hold up. Hold up. Was that a woman with a power tool? No, it's a dirt. Oh.

Rebecca Mistereggen (51:38.72)

No.

Keith Malinak (51:44.494)

y'all don't realize this. A lot of these videos, I watched for the first time with you. After I saw the first couple of tips, I was just like, ah, we're watching this again. That is cool. I've got a spot right over here. Oh my gosh. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. What? I'm trying to get the layout of this ugly two by four right behind your couch. It's between the wall of the couch and the arm of the couch and the wall. And he cut this little tray for the little

power strip. That's a good place to put your drink too. It's a good place to put your drink too. Yes. Look at that, huh? Can't see anything going wrong with that. huh. What's happening here? Okay. A little twisty tie. Alright. Okay. You know, you can bind people's hands with those. I've heard. You've heard. Somebody told you. Look at that.

Rebecca Mistereggen (52:34.124)

was Stanley who told them.

Keith Malinak (52:36.526)

I don't see that that's a problem and I don't know why you'd have a problem with that Okay Confession time Pretty much everything on the wall back here. Just thumb tacked in just random places. Why wouldn't it be?

Rebecca Mistereggen (52:54.606)

I have a new background coming actually and I'm terrified of hanging it because yeah, so this would help. This advice would help me.

Keith Malinak (53:03.246)

Rebecca Mistereggen (53:07.97)

I don't have those in my life,

Keith Malinak (53:10.126)

That's because you're too smart. Wait, what? know what? need to dumb it down a little.

Rebecca Mistereggen (53:14.839)

No.

Keith Malinak (53:16.75)

Hey, what was that? Did that rhyme? didn't even know if that whole last thing, hold that shower thing. Cause that's important. Uh, what'd you say? Did it rhyme what you just said? If you do something, you're not for me.

Rebecca Mistereggen (53:17.208)

You can keep up, you're not for me.

Rebecca Mistereggen (53:29.546)

No, as you said, if you can't keep up.

Keith Malinak (53:31.47)

If you can't keep up, you're not okay. Remember guys the qualifications to to go out there in court Rebecca You got to be funny got to be an introvert and what was the third? You got to be what was the other one?

Rebecca Mistereggen (53:46.606)

She's got to keep up. I'm not dumbing down for you.

Keith Malinak (53:50.348)

be I forgot what it was. alright. nasty. That was just vinegar and and like Dawn detergent sitting in that shower head for an hour. Wait, what's happening?

Rebecca Mistereggen (54:02.634)

I'm missing out on comments here.

Keith Malinak (54:05.068)

Yeah, I you to. Me too, actually. forgot to you. did he level the tape, Crawfisk? OK, thank you. That was my question. just, things are moving by too quickly. And I got lost. that's a good look, too. You really want a pool noodle in your laundry room.

Rebecca Mistereggen (54:23.758)

Thanks, Crawfish. I'm single for a reason. You're right.

Keith Malinak (54:26.99)

Remember, everything happens for a reason. Sometimes that reason is you make bad decisions.

Rebecca Mistereggen (54:36.049)

yes.

Keith Malinak (54:37.544)

What is that? that clever. are you taking that to the to the store though? Yes, why not? You can take a picture of it. Why couldn't you take? You could take a picture of it. You're right. You're absolutely right. I do this for guests. What? Give them toilet paper? I hope so. That would be awkward if you didn't allow your guests to have to make them know what you do is when you have guests, you make them ask you for toilet paper. And when they do, you hand them like a little stack of single sheets. Give them like a roll of toilet paper.

half of it. of it. No. Oh, that's even better or a bag full of rags. We're we're just oh my god. There you go. Yeah. I'm sorry. All we got are these uh oil. The garage. Anyway, have fun in there. Enjoy. April Fool's. April Fool's.

Brad Staggs (55:17.794)

from the.

Rebecca Mistereggen (55:27.37)

Am I the only woman out there that thinks like lot of pillows and shit in the bed is just annoying?

Keith Malinak (55:33.934)

They get in the way on the workbench.

Rebecca Mistereggen (55:35.928)

They do.

Keith Malinak (55:38.264)

You out.

Rebecca Mistereggen (55:38.988)

And by workbench, mean like playing and having my coffee in the morning, watching my new favorite show and.

Keith Malinak (55:46.318)

which is.

Rebecca Mistereggen (55:49.07)

I'm going to be so embarrassed right now, but I'm just going to come out and say, watching married at first sight Australia, and it's more like horror at first sight. And now you understand why these people are single, just like Crawfish said, because it is absolutely.

Keith Malinak (55:52.909)

mind.

Keith Malinak (56:05.802)

at first sight.

Rebecca Mistereggen (56:08.423)

Married at first sight, Australia.

Keith Malinak (56:11.298)

Is that like 90 day fiance?

So wait, what's the premise?

Rebecca Mistereggen (56:18.062)

They have never met, they get married and they have these experts that are guiding them through a marriage.

Keith Malinak (56:23.224)

Wait, they never, so they get introduced and they get married. Sure, there's like a list of

Rebecca Mistereggen (56:28.756)

They get introduced at the altar.

Keith Malinak (56:31.502)

Based on a list of things that they like, based on what?

Rebecca Mistereggen (56:38.934)

like their personality and what they're looking for and block cute couples but i'm telling you i

Keith Malinak (56:42.485)

So like AI pairs them up?

Rebecca Mistereggen (56:49.302)

I understand now why I don't have a group of female friends anymore. Because they're bat shit crazy.

Keith Malinak (56:54.03)

It's biatches, right?

Thank you.

Keith Malinak (57:08.024)

Right, Keith? Brad, there comes a point, right? Like say you're watching a baseball game, right? And the announcer just, he lets the action speak for itself. Right. He doesn't say, hey, look at that. That ball is outside. We can see it's outside. Okay. It's a ball. Unless you're watching a CB Buckner game. Right. Or there's no way to know. Well, technically it was a ball. I'm going to beat you since it was a ball. So let's just let her continue and just sit back here and enjoy.

Why don't you have any girlfriends again? us.

Rebecca Mistereggen (57:40.514)

The female group thing?

Keith Malinak (57:42.36)

Bradley! I literally just got done explaining. We sit back and we listen.

Rebecca Mistereggen (57:47.93)

a group of females collectively, know, group thinking and hating on each other and being jealous and borderline and psychotic and undermining each other and talking shit behind other people's back and trying to ruin people's relationship. And they're fucking crazy.

Keith Malinak (58:05.806)

Somebody hurt you recently. this when they all dress up in pajamas and have a pillow fight? Because I'm. That would be the best way to settle that.

Rebecca Mistereggen (58:10.616)

No, that's not the one. That is the one. That is only on OnlyFans.

Keith Malinak (58:15.726)

So do you have any of your Norwegian girlfriends there? they speak English? Anyone here? Everyone there speak English? Oh, that's cool. Everyone here in Texas speaks Norwegian. So I mean, that makes sense then. would be reciprocal. Right. That's what it sounds like to us anyway.

Rebecca Mistereggen (58:20.374)

Everyone. Yeah.

Rebecca Mistereggen (58:40.204)

It's the Herbie Grady.

Can you say that? Can you say Hurtiruta?

Keith Malinak (58:47.726)

Hoop dee doofa. I can say Hey, cuss us out in Norwegian real quick and let's see if YouTube has any problems later.

Rebecca Mistereggen (58:56.364)

What?

Keith Malinak (59:06.542)

I heard I heard MFR in there is I know that too I heard that too it's like the universal yes it is

Rebecca Mistereggen (59:17.9)

Better in North Norwegian.

Keith Malinak (59:25.774)

Just take a chill pill. was rude. That crossed the line. I need a towel. That crossed the line.

Rebecca Mistereggen (59:32.11)

Are you slipping off your chair?

Keith Malinak (59:35.574)

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

Rebecca Mistereggen (59:39.042)

that thing wants to know.

Keith Malinak (59:40.942)

I he's not here, if he was, I would tell him to I love this. This is I feel like I should know who this woman is. somebody's mother, Dorothea Taylor. Play doubles. How do you play?

Rebecca Mistereggen (59:45.976)

Where is that?

Brad Staggs (59:53.132)

People always asking me how do you

Keith Malinak (01:00:20.238)

That's how she got her man.

Can you do that, Rebecca? Bet you could try.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:00:25.824)

No.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:00:29.941)

No.

Keith Malinak (01:00:35.15)

I hope this goes on for like 10 minutes.

Keith Malinak (01:00:47.438)

What's wrong with being attracted to trains?

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:00:51.158)

Nothing nothing. I just thought it was funny

Keith Malinak (01:00:54.572)

was spectacular. Am I right? That granny could sure beat a drum.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:01:03.95)

New glasses, I'm picking up my new glasses on Wednesday.

Keith Malinak (01:01:08.482)

What do they look like, doll?

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:01:10.779)

Really, really sexy for my bedtime reading.

Keith Malinak (01:01:16.29)

Just before the pillow fight.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:01:18.606)

There's no pillow.

Keith Malinak (01:01:20.034)

Come on, there's gotta be a pillow fight. You're not gonna convince me there's not a pillow fight. What are you reading?

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:01:24.108)

I only have- I don't have all those-

Keith Malinak (01:01:28.11)

Tell us, tell us the name of the book.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:01:31.682)

Well, actually, there's three books.

It's the psychology of money. It is the grieving woman and then also the silent patient. Those are the three books I'm reading at the moment.

Keith Malinak (01:01:47.822)

Did you ever read the screaming silence?

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:01:57.432)

He's not here. You got to ask.

Keith Malinak (01:02:03.225)

I'm I don't know why Keith's under the desk. That's awkward. I've I've Stanley spends a great deal of time there and I do not know why. Boy. I did. That's the holy week everybody. Right? What what? mean, okay. So, let's see this guy right here. Is this is this a guy like, let's see. Is is he attractive to you, Rebecca?

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:02:27.522)

you

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:02:31.117)

No.

Keith Malinak (01:02:32.174)

and why he's a metrosexual. if he's a genius metrosexual? because he could, you know what? He could be very smart. You don't know that. You cannot judge a book by its cover.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:02:35.022)

That's right.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:02:45.614)

When my $100 moisturizer disappears quicker than it normally does, I'm going to get pissed off.

Keith Malinak (01:02:52.43)

That's an interesting way to look at it. And I think you're right. I think you're right. I he just, I mean, yes, I think you're.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:03:01.08)

Like how are we ever going to get out the door? spend too long in the bathroom and then he's going to do the same.

Keith Malinak (01:03:06.316)

Right. Yeah. You need you. Do you think you're high maintenance?

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:03:11.787)

Yeah, of course, I'm a woman.

Keith Malinak (01:03:14.254)

Not all women are high maintenance. now I would beg to differ. I would beg to differ. I think that there are some women who are not high maintenance. Are you worth the high maintenance?

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:03:16.631)

Yes they are.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:03:25.076)

Yes, of course I am. Don't you know how smart I am?

Keith Malinak (01:03:28.462)

You're tell me you're gonna that's that is going to be you're gonna have to dial that one down. You're going to have to appear dumber.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:03:39.508)

I will not. will stay alone for the rest of my life. And mind you, I enjoy being alone as well. Like I know that people that don't don't really believe the fact that people can enjoy their own company, but I really, really do. And I'm craving it so bad right now. Like I got half an hour on my own. My mom came, picked up Aida, took her for a walk and I was just sitting here with my coffee.

Keith Malinak (01:03:46.338)

Introvert

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:04:06.186)

And my Easter crime show. Yes, that is an original thing. We always have like crime come out in Easter, like books and shows and stuff. And so was watching it and just enjoying the quiet of no nobody else's energy in my space.

Keith Malinak (01:04:21.742)

When you're alone, do you prefer to be by yourself?

I tell you what, is there a copay associated with this? Do you need to get on a couch and have this conversation? If there's a good couch handy, yeah, I could use it. All right, no Googling here. No Googling here. OK, let's see what you come up with for the final Jeopardy answer. we go. The category is. it. You can't hear it. I miss Alex Trebek. I'll tell you that. He's dead, Keith. Move on. That's what I'm saying. I miss him. I miss Michael Hutchins, too. This is as loud as gets. you hear this? Jeopardy answer is calendar date.

with which the 20th century began. Okay, did you hear that? Calendar date with which the 20th century began. Good luck. Good luck.

Keith Malinak (01:05:09.644)

Big shedding.

calendar date with which the 20th century began.

feel like it's a trick question. Can I phone a friend I have a really smart girl that I know? Rebecca, what's the answer?

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:05:30.604)

January 1st.

Keith Malinak (01:05:33.07)

What year? This is where they get you. Pencils down, damn you! is... As I think... Schaeffer, were in third place with $1100. Wait, that guy's name is Paul Schaeffer? He doesn't look anything like Paul Schaeffer. Oh, this is before he went bald. Right. The answer was the date with which the 20th century began. you said the final Jeopardy question was...

What was January 1, 1900? That's where they got me. I'm sorry to say. I see how much money you risked on that. $1,100. And that means you wind up with zero. You wind up with shit. Man, you're a dumb ass. You're going lose it and Rebecca will never look at you twice. Yeah, that guy's on January 1, 1900. much did you risk on that incorrect question? All of it. All of it. All of it. You wind up with nothing. Who does Rebecca end up with? I have a feeling I know how I can.

He started off with $9,500. Let's find out, of all, what he thought the Final Jeopardy question was. What is January 1, 1900? We know now that is wrong, but how much did he risk? Did he go for the whole bundle?

Keith Malinak (01:06:46.506)

Not so smart now, are you, Jeopardy Boy?

Why wouldn't he bet? Because he's in the lead. So he should be betting, you know, nine thousand four. I'm at a loss for words in a situation like this. Three zeros. They're all they're all gone. None of them is coming back. Hey, folks. And he forgets to give us the answer to the very end. Easy come, easy go.

Contestants wound up with nothing. have consolation prizes for each of them. Tomorrow on Jeopardy! we'll be bringing in three new players to play the game. our champion, remember Greg, is not leaving us empty handed. He won $8,400. Okay, what's the answer, Alex? So until next time on he doesn't tell us the answer, I'm gonna be dead. answer? answer? 1901. You mean what is the question? The question is January 1, 1901. Yeah, sorry. 1901.

Cuz see, I guess it's the full year has to go. I was thinking the other way. I thought that's how they're gonna get us that it was. see, I used to know that. Then, I forgot and then I remembered after I saw that because I said January 1st, 1900 as well. So, there you go. So, now, you start counting with one but that still doesn't. Yeah, cuz cuz you don't get to the one until December 31st. Right. It's yeah, it's once he's ten. So, that's nineteen.

19th century. See that? Well, that's always what throws me off. It's like we're in the 21st century but it's the year 2000. Dark bark. You lose. Um. Start this back at zero here. That was uh that was fun while it lasted. So, you didn't know either. So, Rebecca, you're not as damn smart as you thought you were. Yeah. Alright, guys. We'll return to your calls. Stupid. now that she's uh dumb, um you might be. You're just like us, Rebecca.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:08:24.802)

Keith Malinak (01:08:47.596)

Just stupid. She doesn't have to know that, which all the guys have to think she's dumb.

you just have to play with your hair a little bit and go and then. me hear a little bit. See, they they all know how to do that. They do. This is me off to no end. Okay. Well, they all they're born that way. They are born knowing how to that. With that superpower. huh.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:09:16.194)

worker telling me once, said, you women don't use your full potential. If I was born a woman with tits, great tits, like I would rule the world before 25.

Keith Malinak (01:09:28.834)

I'd never leave the house.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:09:33.3)

Thank you, Mary.

Keith Malinak (01:09:34.062)

They have to get boring after a while, Okay. Don't think. Make it stop. I mean, seriously.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:09:42.912)

Always great bread, always, which is why I'm actually now contemplating to buy the domain Nork Confessions and just like...

Keith Malinak (01:09:53.239)

Would you like to buy that from me?

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:09:56.982)

and just put up Norc stories.

Keith Malinak (01:09:59.022)

is how much is that domain right now nortconfessions.com and don't be doing no.edu or.org.com. I'm looking at.co not while I'm looking do you want.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:10:12.62)

I believe the eyelashes to marry and we in Norwe... Little Little Mermaid, the Disney movie, it was really funny with the crab and he had a a Bergen accent and he would go like this.

Keith Malinak (01:10:21.388)

best.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:10:33.134)

So that stuck with me for life.

Keith Malinak (01:10:34.68)

Yeah, but clarify, did Brad hear anus?

Keith Malinak (01:10:39.982)

uh. What? What? Nor somebody bought Nor Confessions under your nose? Uh no. Um uh uh uh Rebecca, you can buy Nor Confessions.com for me for only $1000. So, deal? Do we have a deal?

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:10:55.918)

The is $1,000 and it's for you, Brad.

Keith Malinak (01:11:00.782)

It's actually available promo code for norkconfessions.com like if we wanted to sign up you better get this because right now it is What's the promo?

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:11:09.848)

It's a Norx 6-9

Keith Malinak (01:11:13.294)

What's that mean? What does that mean? 69 % off.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:11:16.622)

It will give you $6.9 off your $20 subscription.

Keith Malinak (01:11:22.318)

I prefer 68. Okay, so it's uh $20 a month. Uh norconfessions.com. Can't wait. Look, I got something. I have a special for you. have a surprise. A PS. Everybody go to church tonight. Huh? What? What am I doing? A surprise over here. Uh You ready? Oh no. No. No. No. You can't. No. Time out. On that, I call party foul.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:11:42.542)

You can not go further

Keith Malinak (01:11:44.128)

a conversation about norks and then throw up a picture of that Olympic guy. was his name? Bruce Jenner. That's his dead name. Her name. got Caitlyn Jenner. Listen, Caitlyn is making sense here. Just listen to Caitlyn.

Brad Staggs (01:11:59.918)

the longest time I thought I can't transition. I'm too tall. My voice sucks and it still sucks today, but I really don't care. I got over all of that, but I'm so tall. I would just dominate. I'd walk into a room and I'd be taller than any. And then you put heels on and you're going now six, two, I'm six, five, six, six now, you know? And it's like, my God, I'm just too tall. I can't do it. And then he gets to the point where you say heck with it. And I went to get a physical.

And the lady goes, you're 6'1". And I said, no, no, you don't understand. I'm 6'2". I've been 6'2 my whole life. She goes, no, you're 6'1". I said, no way, re-measure me. So I go back and I get up on

Keith Malinak (01:12:39.284)

all. no. Six one. I know where this is.

Brad Staggs (01:12:42.178)

thinking perfect, can go an inch higher on the heel now. And I'm thinking this is perfect. By the time I'm 90, I'll be a perfect five 10. At least I'm going the right direction for the longest time I thought. Right.

Keith Malinak (01:12:56.302)

like Caitlyn Jenner. Okay. Yeah, I don't. don't. I'm. I'm. Bruce. I'm. Okay. Whatever. I just I like that person. That's not where I thought it was going. So. Oh I just thought that would that would that made perfect sense. Find me a can you find me an interview or have they been scrubbed? Find me an interview. Maybe go to YouTube and type in Bruce Jenner 1976 Olympics. Have you? I want to see. Hold on. Hold on. Interview. I want to see and I want to see what he sounded like as a dude. He like that without the. Yeah.

Keith Malinak (01:13:35.71)

the world knows now for his uh tremendous achievement the 1976 Olympics where he won the decathlon probably the most arduous athletic event in history

And since that time he's made a great name for himself as a sportscaster, recently joined NBC television. that for a second. Pause that. that. I had like, well, when he comes out, it'll be more obvious. Dogs are barking. Yeah, thank you. I noted that. Press play. Let me see a little bit sports world and will be one of the hosts of the Olympics 1980. is this Just bring the guest out, man. Monday, July 24th, I assume on NBC. you welcome Mr. Jenner.

Oh, it won't be like 52? Okay.

Keith Malinak (01:14:29.422)

Manly handshake there. That's a manly hand, yeah, that's man's man right there. What? That's a manly tall too. Okay, when we get a close-up, I want you to pause. Did you see the size of that animal?

Keith Malinak (01:14:47.226)

Don't tell me. just be thankful they didn't have the hundred yard pig carry in the Olympics or something like that for that final event instead of the 50. So when I was a kid, you know, my hair was just naturally straight or whatever. And I used to think Bruce Jenner, he looks like a girl. I don't want to look like that. Wow. I didn't know how prescient I was. really a broke.

Brad Staggs (01:15:08.894)

because when I was in college, small school in Iowa, and know how Iowa guys have a town of 1,000 people, you have to create your own type of pets and everything. I had two pet pigs. Did you really? Yes, I had two, very small, the mother had...

Keith Malinak (01:15:22.194)

Now, she's got a couple of pigs. Oink oink. Man, that's somebody else I miss. Johnny Carson. I miss all these greats. I know. Alex Johnny Carson. Do you? Wait, Rebecca, do you know who Johnny Carson is? Johnny Carson was a, he was host of the Tonight Show. Probably arguably the best host the Tonight Show ever had. And definitely. Can't argue that. Right. Well, you could but people argue about all kinds of stupid things. I guess. But

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:15:34.2)

No.

Keith Malinak (01:15:51.406)

the best, the the best show, the best uh tonight show host. I mean, better than anybody today. We got it. You like him. I did. I should have married him. Norfolk, Nebraska. Well, and I, he, you never knew. He could have been an extent, probably was a lefty. I think he was Democrat. Oh, definitely he was. gave, but you never knew it. That's the thing. You never knew that about him. He kept it. And in fact, the 60 minutes clip is absolutely just brilliant and should be listened to by every

late night host today because he was far left and the only reason I know that is because I read something that he gave tons of money. I hate to ruin this for everyone. He gave tons of money to Planned Parenthood, but he didn't get on his show and say, let's go and murder babies. I'll just do that in private. But his message to late night talk host today is, hey, you know what? Keep the politics out of it. You're here to entertain. Know your place. But they don't. They can't.

They cannot for whatever they can't keep their pie hole shut. You've missed a really good period of time, Rebecca. I feel sorry for you because yeah, we feel sorry. Really a good the 70s, the 80s were an incredible period of time. We feel sorry for you that you weren't born in America like us. Right.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:17:10.878)

I feel the 90s was like peak humanity.

Keith Malinak (01:17:14.798)

was peak music. was peak humanity. you're missing it by decades. eighties was set in the table for the nineties.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:17:25.698)

I was born in the 80s, so I guess like I'm cool, right?

Keith Malinak (01:17:29.998)

I don't know if we know how old you are. Well, yeah, we do, because you said you were 29. I didn't do the math. what year was it? Don't think about it too much. So the whole... doesn't kind of count. Do you have late night shows in Norway?

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:17:46.828)

Yeah.

Keith Malinak (01:17:47.646)

Banning fjern do the purred. Okay, so we need Spend us some links of Norwegian late nights late nights in Norway Oslo after hours

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:17:50.318)

Birdie birdie, right

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:17:57.41)

that be.

I think would be like the biggest one.

Keith Malinak (01:18:05.058)

What is? I love that with ketchup. How do you spell scum?

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:18:13.39)

All right in here. On that.

Keith Malinak (01:18:16.014)

Why you just say it so I can type it over here.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:18:19.534)

Gov'lum, I just said it.

Keith Malinak (01:18:22.102)

Okay. There it is on the scov. It's on the screen, that's that's scav land. That's not scum. It's scab lamb, scab lamb, scab lamb. I wonder what what happens when we go and type in scab lamb. We get zero to mirror. We get backpack billionaires. We don't. is it so is this like is this anime?

You're into anime. What? I'll tell you, you rounded up another group of guys there. you dumb it down and get into anime, man, you'll have your pick of the litter. So tell us a joke in Norwegian that you might hear on late night TV and do it in Norway. And then tell us and point at us when we should laugh.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:19:09.594)

What? I don't even know what

Keith Malinak (01:19:10.99)

I don't even know what show I'm Just tell us a joke in Norwegian. I bet it sounds funny even if we can't understand the punchline.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:19:22.54)

You put me on the spot!

Keith Malinak (01:19:23.63)

yeah, get that ready. Turn it off. Turn it off. Turn it off. She's gonna tell us a joke. I wasn't those them out there. don't know. Let's do knock knock in Norwegian. Let's go. No.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:19:31.584)

joke I wanted

Keith Malinak (01:19:37.646)

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:19:47.729)

my god!

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:19:55.214)

English wall mutants say so so all what you play

Keith Malinak (01:20:01.216)

Sorry, nothing right.

you she's funny. She's smart. She's not tall. and I mean, she's not opinionated. Guys, this is the woman for you. Yeah. is I sell her enough. I mean, is that wrong to try to sell the woman? Well, yeah, they have to pass an interview from us before they're out on a date. kind of like your surrogate fathers. Yeah. Yeah. And

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:20:29.678)

I'm going to tell you a long one. It's really, really funny.

Keith Malinak (01:20:31.822)

See you later.

long.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:20:37.889)

Okay.

NRK had sent up their young journalist to Vidda outside Karasjokk to make a documentary about the saman. The mission took over several months and the young man who had good access to women was concerned about how this would go. The week before the fire broke out, who had gotten anything on for what the saman do when they are out on Vidda without women for so long. It's simple. If you vote for the rain, you are a saman.

Keith Malinak (01:21:05.181)

Lura!

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:21:09.582)

No!

Keith Malinak (01:21:34.85)

Good night.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:21:38.014)

Is she possessed?

Keith Malinak (01:21:44.11)

I she's dead.

Keith Malinak (01:21:53.8)

No. You can't tell that joke! No!

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:21:58.606)

There we have 1000 losers and then you away and you take the most ugly we have the together. But Sanlo said okay.

Keith Malinak (01:22:05.984)

Right? just, I've never heard.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:22:10.444)

It's about zombie people, reindeers, raping reindeers.

Keith Malinak (01:22:13.906)

Yeah. Hold on. Don't you have to explain? Brad. Brad. all heard the damn joke. Hang on. Hang on. What? Did you just say the phrase rapey reindeers? Who? Rapey reindeer? gosh. That one never gets old. Yeah. Yeah, right. I mean, honestly. Right. And you didn't say rapay. Rapay reindeer. What is wrong with you? Hey, I just want to mention this because you

Brad Staggs (01:22:14.348)

You're.

Keith Malinak (01:22:42.178)

you know, price of energy is up. So now we've got to, you know, jack up baggage fees that, used to be free. But anyway, you got to jack them up. So I want this is seriously, you need to write this website down. It's, it's called Nort Confessions, NortConfessions.com. Where is this website here? It's DontGetFlocked.com. Don't get... no.

You're gonna want this website. Let me tell you something. Let's see. Don't get flocked. Let me tell you what this does. Cause when I tell you, you're gonna want to really pay attention cause you'll love this site. You're gonna just love it. Okay. Don't get flocked.com. Now what does website is? Don't get flocked.com. It's on the screen. It's not what you just said.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:23:33.107)

I thought you said flogged.

Keith Malinak (01:23:35.586)

OK, so what this site does is you map a route and then it will it will take you around away from any kind of surveillance cameras. And so it will even go down to the point where which direction the camera is angled. It's absolutely fascinating. And obviously, it'll take you, you know, 20 times as long to get to your destination. But if you want to avoid traffic cameras and not be logged into some national database.

Don't get flocked.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:24:08.044)

So this is great for serial killers.

Keith Malinak (01:24:09.912)

Syracuse can use this anybody right right good idea rapists

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:24:15.18)

Rob petting his pussy.

Keith Malinak (01:24:17.518)

I love this is my favorite thing to do on a Friday. Okay, so anyway, I'll just stay in all Friday evening. And just rub it.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:24:26.978)

While you're petting

Keith Malinak (01:24:30.318)

back. Is that what the kids are calling it these days? Is that a euphemism? are we? Wow. What are we doing here? Uh okay. I love this person. It loves me. Did you need some time alone? No, we like to, we like getting flocked right here in public. Okay. Okay. Let me go to the chat real quick. Uh oh. Hey, can you call? I want Rebecca to be introduced to to the. Rebecca's not here, man. To the Mojave uh phone booth.

Keith Malinak (01:25:01.74)

Hold on. You've got a big cat in your lap now, unfortunately. It's huge. And it really, I see you. see you, James. Good call. Good call. CIA Capitol police officers. That's who would want to know where the cameras are facing. That's a thinking man's point. James. Good job. Good job.

Okay, so you're gonna put the cat on the floor so we can call the Mojave. He wants me to stop playing with the pussy. Yeah, so Rebecca, Rebecca, let me tell you about this situation here that we've done before in the past and it'll probably fail today because I'm throwing it at you here on the spur of moment. way back in the day, there used to be a phone booth in the middle of the Mojave Desert here in the desert southwest. Preface this whole thing by Americans are weird and have too much time on their. We're weird. We're weird. And somebody discovered there was a phone booth out there and just,

would randomly call it and and people would pick it up and they would just talk to strangers and then eventually people would show up there and just kind of damage the environment around the phone booth and so the government took it away but some guy bought the phone number and now it's just a party line where people just I'm also calling you because you're going to be in on it. yeah. Okay. That's right. So just answer the phone and shut up. I'm on the phone right now. Just do your thing. Do your thing. Okay. So we're waiting for Brad to call the Mojave phone.

Should we give people the phone number to call the Mojave? Sure. Because how many people can be on at a time?

Brad Staggs (01:26:28.974)

a lot.

Keith Malinak (01:26:30.062)

it's it's a 7607339969. Yeah. Yeah, baby. Yeah. You're welcome. You are welcome. Okay. So, uh so you got a

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:26:46.318)

Giving away my phone number to strangers.

Keith Malinak (01:26:49.838)

you know what you uh you enjoy it and uh and and men like that too uh okay why am I not okay you gotta mute yours it doesn't go off all the way you uh yours you have a problem why is it so low

Nine, four, conference. here we go.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:27:24.745)

Yeah.

Keith Malinak (01:27:25.518)

Why is it low? What? Whoa. What'd you just do? She hang you. Boy, she did not like you, did she? I didn't do anything. I think you did. I hear a loud pussy.

Keith Malinak (01:27:40.494)

I don't know why it's doing this this way. they know your color. it so low? I, no, that's not why either. You broke it.

Keith Malinak (01:27:52.366)

Well, if it's not going to work, then it's not going to work because huh had I known I could have had that I know but you know maybe maybe if I do it this way. that that that sounds promising. number you have dialed has been changed to a conference. okay. is that? Zero four B board. There it is. Press one.

through nine, four, conference.

Press zero four B board. Press one through nine four conference. Press zero four B board. Good. That's a wild goose chase. Why did I didn't have to do this last time? Yeah, I think I think I think they're wise to us. Did you break it? I didn't do any. Oh no, here it comes. Here it comes. Concrete in sand dunes, a foam booth refused to die.

They send you a text and then then you get through somehow. Was that supposed to be on the phone again? No, no, no. Once I get it, I'll bring you in.

Rebecca, don't you think this is awesome?

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:29:08.158)

Really awesome. used to do this when we were kids, like having a phone book and then just call random people and tell them their Chinese takeaway was on the way.

Keith Malinak (01:29:16.014)

What's the phone book? heard of such a thing. them their Chinese takeout was on the way. That's awesome.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:29:22.318)

Y'all didn't matter will it be that I see come at quarter?

Keith Malinak (01:29:25.774)

I'm You'd say that too. I would do that. Who doesn't? Who hasn't said that in the last 24 hours? all the time. We're sorry. The number you have dialed. No, no, no, no. That's when it's that's when you're getting closer. I'm sorry. Like I said, I love it. Press zero four B board. Press one through.

Brad Staggs (01:29:27.201)

YEAH!

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:29:53.487)

He really wants, he has something to say.

Keith Malinak (01:29:55.82)

Let's hear it, Ken.

Hello?

Code is just a tool. Pacific Bell left its child. They send you a weird text before you get through.

hello? No, it's not, That sucked, butthead. Yeah, you broke it. Thanks for breaking the, Mojave phone booth, That's what I do. I break things. I break things.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:30:28.214)

Using my hair over here. Yeah. Like baby hair is all...

Keith Malinak (01:30:30.508)

Are you really? Join the club. Are you getting ball? The office.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:30:37.794)

you know.

Keith Malinak (01:30:39.768)

Did she just tell me to get out? I think so. I think she did. You've heard that one before, right, Brad? I've heard that. I can't tell you how many times I've heard that just today. a matter of today? OK, I love this guy. OK, so I don't understand this. Whenever I get scam calls or whatever, it's a call. It's not a video thing. So I don't know the back story on trying to get this guy in front of your face here like this. But.

But this guy here is using the little face, the fake face thing, you know, and I guess there's a way if you're talking to somebody online to tell if you're using AI and the face generator thing or what have you. So, so take a look at the press star 16 and it'll tell you some AI thing. How do I know you're not some AI thing here? Okay. Here we go. How do I know you're not some AI thing? What, what, what, how would I be able to tell?

Brad Staggs (01:31:33.39)

Here, Matt. Here.

Keith Malinak (01:31:36.174)

So can you hold that up?

Brad Staggs (01:31:38.488)

It's not a yeah. Yeah, absolutely.

Keith Malinak (01:31:43.79)

But that's it.

Brad Staggs (01:31:44.78)

That's our director.

Keith Malinak (01:31:47.307)

I see. thought it would be your name.

Brad Staggs (01:31:50.318)

No, no, no, that's our director. We have a multiple, you see all of them here.

Keith Malinak (01:31:54.542)

I see. but you know, it's some way of telling whether you're real or not. Can you like hold up three fingers in front of your face? What's that? What's that now?

Brad Staggs (01:32:05.832)

come on, that's too much.

Keith Malinak (01:32:08.088)

What? you don't want to do that.

Brad Staggs (01:32:11.448)

Well, I'll do that here.

Keith Malinak (01:32:13.25)

in front of your face.

Brad Staggs (01:32:15.938)

What do mean? I mean, that's too much. Come on, Ronnie.

Keith Malinak (01:32:18.766)

Why would it affect the AI if it was in front of your face?

Brad Staggs (01:32:24.558)

Well, not at all. But, too much to ask somebody.

Keith Malinak (01:32:26.136)

Can you?

But make sure you're not AI. Is that unreasonable? mean, can you do that in front of your face?

Brad Staggs (01:32:34.926)

Well, I think that that's too much to ask somebody don't you think that

Keith Malinak (01:32:39.374)

No, I don't think it is. If I'm not AI, I think that's a reasonable thing to ask. Can you hold up three fingers in front of your face?

Brad Staggs (01:32:49.198)

Well, I think that, well, is that enough?

Keith Malinak (01:32:52.31)

No, it's not in front of your face.

Brad Staggs (01:32:55.704)

Well, that's too much, don't you think?

Keith Malinak (01:32:57.378)

Yes, it is. If you were real, you would put up three fingers in front of your face. end of call. So I guess I don't have any experience with that. So if you put three fingers in front of your face, it just blurs it or shows that you're fake.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:33:15.602)

I have really good AI.

Keith Malinak (01:33:18.048)

Okay, alright, so Norway's got top of the line. One, two, three. You know what? You just reminded me of something. I meant to address this on my day job. Pat Gray unleashed over at the place. That time that we... Nancy Pelosi was saying one, two, three. Nothing pisses me off more. Well, that's not accurate. One thing that really pisses me off is when people start counting and they use their thumb as the one.

first of all, we're gonna do this. Second, we're gonna do this. No, it's why I don't know. I don't know, Brad. What's wrong with that? I don't like the thumb being first. It's just rude sometimes when you use the thumb first. I mean, am I right or am I right? And I think, you know, I'm right. The thumb needs, right, Rebecca needs to know. I'm sorry. What what did you say? We've lost Rebecca. She's asleep. She went 90 nights.

Hey, Rebecca, count to three and hold up your fingers when you do it. Go.

Just count to three. Put in front of your face. Put it in front of your feet. Just count to three on your feet.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:34:20.439)

on

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:34:30.35)

I'm gonna put my toes in front of my head.

Keith Malinak (01:34:32.206)

Yeah, put your toes in front of your face. yeah.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:34:34.68)

Let's my feet.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:34:38.958)

That's the only time Brad wants to see feet is if you can get them in front of your face.

Keith Malinak (01:34:44.45)

the

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:34:55.246)

Julie, do you not read several books at a time? I kind of do because I have so many books I need to get through, but I guess I'm slow because I read

Keith Malinak (01:35:02.894)

a slow too. so Pretending you can read. I'm a slow reader too. That is so sweet. That's precious. She pretends she can read. let's no we've already updated the the no bark board. So, we're good. We're already caught up on that. Thanks kids. gosh. Can can we I really I want I don't like attorneys. I mean, unless they're hot. And even then, it's questionable. Okay. But where's this going? The the attorney and you, the the the dick

Dick judge. The dick judge who there might actually be a good development in the dick judge. That's not just Nick judges. No, no, no. That's I don't know what her name is. Dong.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:35:45.326)

It's a long long

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:35:50.286)

That is Jalanjong downtown New

Keith Malinak (01:35:52.51)

I'm to go. She's the I call her. It's weird because they call her downtown. It's weird that they you knew her nickname but she is giving us an update. Are you familiar with the Dick Judge? Rebecca? is a he's the he's the judge that told the IT guy to get out of his courtroom. The judge couldn't figure out how to what was the issue? What like because he couldn't get zoom to work. Okay. That's what I've not

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:36:07.277)

No.

Keith Malinak (01:36:21.582)

picked up on any of the stories about the dick judge. Yes, he tried to. He had to call IT because he couldn't get zoom to work and there was some phone he had to set up in his court and he get to work. And no, but he was a dick. I mean, he has a robe and everything, but he was just it was a dick to the IT guy. The IT guy said, oh, it must have been like a hallucination or something. He's just trying to make a funny and judge. No, it's a serious and I get out of my courtroom. I mean, just total Pecker would just I mean.

He's a dick judge. He's a total dick judge and let me see if I can find you just real quick. A judge who is a dick. that be funny? Um. Judge who is a dick in Houston. Who's a dick in Houston. You might get some kink sites out of that search. Oh yeah. You don't want that one. Uh judge and IT.

I bet that brings up. Yeah, there we go. So this is the this is the original story here where the IT guys are trying to help him.

Don't joke around, I'm serious about this. What's happening?

Brad Staggs (01:37:37.536)

I I understand. just saying I can't see his arm.

Keith Malinak (01:37:40.282)

Thank you.

I mean, and that was it. mean, and, and I mean, the guy was just a peckerwood. I'm sorry, your honor, a peckerwood. so he, hold on, hold on. He's like, Hey, do you want me to stay here? Ha ha. Just to make sure it works. I mean, that was fine. It was fine. There was nothing wrong with what that it guy did. Get out of here. I'm incompetent and I don't need it exposed further. Right. And so if you go to the judge's Facebook page,

It doesn't matter what he post. He to present this glowing image of I'm just such a good guy and blob. And every one of his posts has something referring to have you apologized to the IT guy yet? Or I bet you can do everything except the zoom call. mean, I the internet when they do that stuff. Yes. I mean, it is brutal. And all the judge had to do was post a picture or short video of him with the IT guy.

I told you know, Bob, I I apologize to Bob. We're having a beer and I, you know, I was in a bad mood that day and I needed to get on with the court and whatever. Yeah, that is all the judge had to do to make this thing go poof and go away. But did he? No, he didn't. He just continued being a dick. So anyway, this is the follow up to that judge's story and it is tasty.

Brad Staggs (01:38:57.208)

inside the Harris County Courthouse with why he is not only one speaking out tonight. J-1.

Keith Malinak (01:39:00.397)

the only

Keith Malinak (01:39:03.939)

J-Wa.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:39:04.898)

Yeah, that's exactly right, Keith. The president of the Harris County Criminal Lawyers Association is also speaking out. Now, the attorney I sat down with today says in his decades long career, he's never had to send out an email to a judge about their behavior until now.

Keith Malinak (01:39:21.579)

Get out of my courtroom.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:39:22.606)

By now, you've likely seen this viral video. shows a tense exchange between Harris County Civil Court Judge Nathan Milliron and an IT worker.

Keith Malinak (01:39:30.872)

hearing is done. She's ask

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:39:34.67)

tonight. Another video sh speaking to an attorney i 52 years in law. Attorney

Keith Malinak (01:39:45.494)

And so this judge apparently does this to a lot of people on a lot of occasions. He's just a dick.

Brad Staggs (01:39:52.504)

Good.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:39:53.582)

Stafford tells me after watching this clip, was so offended he emailed Judge Milliron directly telling him quote, I hope you issued him an apology for the way you treated him. the judge wrote. You probably shouldn't be communicating with the judge ex parte on his judicial email address.

Keith Malinak (01:40:12.91)

So now the judge is going after the guy who reprimanded yes, who has no hour right? and this is beautiful right here because listen to what he says in the in the email to this judge So this guy this judge this lawyer right here sent the judge an email saying you should apologize to your IT guy because you're being a dick

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:40:30.424)

Have you ever heard of something like that before?

Keith Malinak (01:40:33.228)

I was not ex-partan because I do not have any cases in this court.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:40:36.172)

Judge Milliron ordered Stafford to court on April 9th telling him he shouldn't be emailing a judge on his judicial email address. you plan to show up in his court on April 9th?

Keith Malinak (01:40:46.35)

The email is not a valid order. So he's not even going to show up because the judge, I mean, it's not even a valid order for this judge to tell some lawyer you need to be in my courtroom. So not only is he a dick, but he apparently doesn't understand the law, which seems a little. Yeah.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:41:04.706)

Sorry, how did he get this job and why is this like.

Keith Malinak (01:41:09.262)

Yeah, I think Mill Iron was elected and and yeah, I'm pretty sure he was don't think he was appointed.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:41:21.091)

Shoot each other and you know, Houston has had serial killers

Keith Malinak (01:41:26.83)

Hold on. Please don't besmirch Houston, Texas, a place that I've lived before and loved. But at least it's humid. I hate that. It has no legal enforcement.

Brad Staggs (01:41:40.18)

organization stands up for good judges who do the right thing and bad judges who don't.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:41:45.102)

isn't the only attorney speaking out. Brent Mayor, the president of the Harris County Criminal Lawyers Association, posted this video on social media.

Brad Staggs (01:41:53.934)

The judge's behavior is appalling.

Brad Staggs (01:42:01.918)

time anyone is going to criticize this judge for his behavior, are they going to get called in front of that judge and be subject to some

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:42:09.974)

I'm just going to say it with the risk of him calling me to court, which in turn would give me a freak.

Keith Malinak (01:42:14.85)

Why why you're free to

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:42:17.08)

Really like small dick energy, like radiating from that judge.

Keith Malinak (01:42:22.338)

Yes. From that guy? Yes. Hold on. That's a new phrase there. S.D.E. So wait a minute though. Hold on. She's got a good point here. Yep. She needs to publicly shame this guy and maybe he'll make you show up. Yeah. He'll you show up in court. He'll compel you to fly to America because that's your town when you come to America, right? Exactly. So there you go. There you go. You get a free ticket. Let's go. Here's what I think. I think this guy

Brad Staggs (01:42:23.918)

What are

Keith Malinak (01:42:50.6)

is like way back in the closet if you know what I'm saying and I think you do.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:42:57.358)

He has a micro penis and maybe not physically, but I think so too. But like personality wise, he has a micro penis. Like he is fragile and you're a freaking judge. You have all the power in a courtroom. You don't need to behave like a dickhead, but you are because you have none because it's this small and you need to do it to feel bigger and to dominate over people because you're small inside. And also you have a micro penis.

Keith Malinak (01:43:27.086)

That phrase has really gotten a traction lately. Because douche canoe doesn't begin to describe that I don't really care for judges. I don't know if that came through or not. this, mean, just what and all he had to do. Hey, Bob and I had a beer. I apologize. He didn't even have to get to that. He could have just not been a jerk in the first place.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:43:51.598)

the

Keith Malinak (01:43:56.622)

But to make this whole thing go away, he just had to like spend 20 seconds just appearing to be nice. Listen to this, Kara 3022. He's a Republican born and raised in Dubois, Pennsylvania. And that's good to know. He was elected to the bench in 2024. So he's not even from Texas. He's a carpet bagger. See, it just irritates the shit out of me that this guy, because all he is is an attorney with a nicer robe. That's all. That's all any of them are.

And they think, and especially like this guy obviously got into his little pea brain that he is all that in a bag of chips. Wow. Do me a favor because his care, you're so good at the research and stuff. look up, who is, Dubois Wyoming named after it's some senator in Pennsylvania. No, no, I know. But look up Dubois Wyoming. See, I love that town. Look up Dubois Wyoming. I want to know who that's named after.

And I to know if he was originally from Pennsylvania. What I'm getting at is I want to know if this cat has two towns in America named after him. DuBois. Town of DuBois, Wyoming named after Fred DuBois, a senator from Idaho. Okay, pause it. Now, who is DuBois, Pennsylvania named after? Huh? Let's see if it's the same one. I don't know. I have this weird feeling. If I'm wrong, whatever. Come on.

Pennsylvania named after John Dubois, a prominent 19th century lumber man and industrialist who settled in the area in 1871. Wait, wait, when was the other one?

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:45:32.202)

sound of lumber man. Why does that sound sexy? Lumber man.

Keith Malinak (01:45:36.5)

I am a, no, I'm a lumber man.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:45:40.704)

Is it because like there's a lot of wood or is it?

Keith Malinak (01:45:42.85)

Is it? A lot of long wood, hardwood, softwood. Is it the flannel that does it for you, Rebecca?

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:45:49.473)

yeah, the flowers like soft, nice and warm.

Keith Malinak (01:45:59.392)

One of these days, we're gonna play the is it a bridge term or not? And we're gonna have Rebecca Reed and we gotta come up with a contest. I to give away the at the Mike show winter caps as a prize. Winter cats? Caps. cats. can't give away. It's always winter in Norway, by the way. What are you looking for?

Stanley is not down there anymore.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:46:29.262)

What is it about my voice that you like? Lumberman. See, you even like that. Lumberman. It's just, it's not my voice. It's the word. I'm telling you. Lumberman. sounds like you smell the fresh air. There's wood, there's flannel. There's like strong black coffee and there's wood.

Keith Malinak (01:46:41.261)

wood.

Keith Malinak (01:46:49.848)

just keep going back. moment? Like what is happening here? Right. Okay. So what we need to do is we need to play this game and have Rebecca read off terms that are associated with Bridge or aren't they? And we need to, I had to figure out a way to do this. How do we get people to participate without them, know, Googling and whatnot? know what?

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:47:18.927)

an entire show in like sexy love voice and about stuff that we want

Keith Malinak (01:47:22.058)

low to yes you should yes you should and i'll be i'll listen nope we should not how do i send a private chat to somebody in the pigeon chat send it to a pigeon through a pigeon how do do this i'm serious how do i send something privately talking about okay what chat

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:47:47.084)

Norwegian Wood is actually it. Well, it was a festival.

Keith Malinak (01:47:51.247)

Is that where the Beatles get their song title there? The Beatles are a musical group from England, Rebecca.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:48:02.508)

I know who the Beatles are, Brad. Come on.

Keith Malinak (01:48:06.222)

How do I send a?

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:48:07.704)

I'm sorry. don't who who's the Beatles sounds really interesting like maybe

Keith Malinak (01:48:13.198)

Wait, Tom McCartney was in a band before Wings?

Keith Malinak (01:48:20.674)

Hold on, hold on. that's it. That's it. Don't Don't stop. Yeah. Shut up, Keith. Let her do it.

Keith Malinak (01:48:29.23)

The show's really gotten away from me today. stopped. Why'd you stop? Don't stop. OK, just... See, it's all paid... All right, I've been watching all the Seinfeld episodes again, and wow, do I miss the 90s. But I recently watched this episode and it's so true. So when it popped up on my feed, I thought, I don't even have to preview this. I know all this stuff from this show. It's so good. Kramer, ahead of his time, as usual. Well, except for the N-word stuff. Anyway, here we go.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:48:34.872)

Yeah.

Keith Malinak (01:48:57.304)

They got a cure for cancer. See, it's all big business. So you're saying UNICEF is a scam? It's the perfect cover for a money laundering operation. And no one could track all those kids with those little orange boxes of change. So what's up diggity dog? I don't see I didn't try to warn you. Jerry, I'm surprised at you. What? It's a con.

These agencies are usually a front for some money laundering scheme or their bunko artists bilking people out of their life savings. yeah! The media Jerry, that's where you hear the truth. Yeah, I think we can help you. I just saw. See, unfortunately the medical establishment is a business like any other business and business needs customers.

Brad Staggs (01:49:34.318)

You get this.

Keith Malinak (01:49:49.034)

They want to sell you their most expensive item, is unnecessary surgery. see, it's in the best interest of the medical profession that you remain sick. See, that ensures good business. You're not a patient, you're a customer.

He's not wrong. What's the matter? You're not right? Ever question my instincts because my instincts are honed. Look at that. What now? Look,

Brad Staggs (01:50:16.718)

Hospital receives grant to conduct DNA research. Government funds genetic research at area hospital. Yeah, so...

Keith Malinak (01:50:24.056)

Pigman, pigman. If I had the pigman one more time... Hey, I'm telling you, the pigman is alive. The government has been experimenting with pigmen since the 50s. wait, stop. But just because a hospital did DNA research doesn't mean they're creating a race of mutant pigmen. Jerry, will you wake up to reality? It's a military thing. They're probably creating a whole army of pig warriors.

Brad Staggs (01:50:38.594)

conducting the.

Brad Staggs (01:50:51.926)

I really miss the Bermuda

Keith Malinak (01:50:53.198)

Ah, we could do this all day. I don't know how long this video is because Instagram sucks and doesn't show me. I mean, Instagram plugin. What I meant to say is at the Mike show is a great follow at Instagram because Gabby is always putting up good stuff over. That's what I meant to say. It came out. It sounded like something else. I Right.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:51:02.542)

gonna go to the pig man.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:51:13.836)

I'm going to try to do this one.

apartmentalization. No fucking hell.

Keith Malinak (01:51:20.332)

No,

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:51:22.822)

Compartmentalization. No, I can't do it. Sorry.

Keith Malinak (01:51:27.746)

Who was asking you to do it?

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:51:29.544)

No, I just read it out loud. It's right there in the comments.

Keith Malinak (01:51:32.366)

we're just disappointed in you. let us down. I can get a free month of the only fans, I'm not just

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:51:36.736)

and

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:51:44.024)

There's no only fans. There's an orcs confession.

Keith Malinak (01:51:47.47)

That's right. I forgot about that. But people can subscribe to your X feed, right?

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:51:52.372)

Yes, they can and nothing happens there is more like support if you want to do a one-time thing and go to buy me a coffee. I would really much prefer though if people well, I would love a coffee but to go to my YouTube channel and follow me there or my sub stack which is my handle that is right there.

Keith Malinak (01:52:12.469)

whoops, sorry. I was giving it, there we go.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:52:13.774)

Same on all platforms. You can go follow me.

Keith Malinak (01:52:18.418)

are Mr. Reagan. Now you can see the word right there. Now try it again. One more time. Give it a shot. it the old college try, Rebecca.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:52:26.552)

compartmentalization.

Keith Malinak (01:52:29.646)

That's what she does on a YouTube channel. would be fun. Okay, so so people can submit in work You subscribe to your deal and you're not gonna you're not even gonna consider submissions that aren't a subscriber to you and if you're a subscriber to Rebecca's X feed then you send her things that you want her to read for you or look at there's her YouTube

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:52:53.71)

Intelligence. Cosmic intelligence. Yeah, there's my YouTube channel.

Keith Malinak (01:53:00.802)

Rebecca, uncensored. Except you look too smart. We're going to have to dumb down your face.

What? You look too smart. I mean, you can't be out there looking all smart. You scare them all away. Tell me we need to dumb you down. What's your goal here? I mean, is it to get a guy or is it to like, you slightly cross your eyes, maybe in drool a little? Hey, here's a fun fact. Here's a fun fact for you. I don't know what it's like in Norway, but nearly 40 % of Americans say that they have less than $500 in cash savings. That much? recent survey.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:53:25.335)

What?

Keith Malinak (01:53:37.678)

This is going to get bad. This is going to get bad, y'all.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:53:41.93)

I usually like I don't right now, but I would usually have more than that in cash. But then I thought if everything just goes to shit, it's like, how am I going to be able to pay with cash? Because all the systems are like on data anyway.

Keith Malinak (01:53:57.198)

Yeah, well. you say when the system goes to shit? Yeah. Are you cashless yet over in Norway? You're getting it.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:54:02.85)

We had trouble with the bank AX, the terminals for the credit cards and stuff, like one of the stores here had. We couldn't pay with card. What are you going to do? If somebody hacks it, it's down in an instant.

Keith Malinak (01:54:20.654)

I'm telling you, man, there's a nasty trend happening in North Fort Worth. I am finding restaurant after restaurant that has prominently displayed. I tweeted about it earlier today. I took a couple of pictures. These were two restaurants right next door to each other, and both of them said, we are cashless only at this establishment. I went into one of them, though, and I said, hey, I see it says that you're cashless. And this is the kind of guy I am. I was like, you know, that's

That's illegal. Anyway, the manager was very cool. He said, you know what? I'll take, I'll take cash. You know, he they have to take cash. It says so on the, on the currency itself.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:55:04.886)

It's the same in Norway. You can't say that you don't take cash, but somehow they've managed to let some businesses off on this. Like we have this hairdresser chain called Cutters. They only cut hair like 15 minutes. They're cashless.

Keith Malinak (01:55:21.614)

So, so, so John Fetterman, that's his big thing. He's trying to make it so that it it's actually codified in law, not just, you know, printed on a piece of paper. So the manager said, you know, I'll take cash, but I don't have any change. And so my grand total was 1191. And I said, here's 11. I said, here's your nine cent tip. You're right. I should have said, I said, What is my problem? I should have said, here's 11 bucks. You're so right, dude.

what am I thinking? I want to go relive this day now. when you go take a bat with you and hit him. Yeah. It makes you feel a lot. It's surprising how much better you feel after you whack a knucklehead upside the head with the bat. Yeah. Not that I'm advocating violence. Hang on. He decided to leave. Here we go. He went to get the bat, didn't he? Went to get the bat. Yeah, it's like. yeah. That's cute. Yeah. I mean, I know you hear that a lot but

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:56:16.685)

Roll back.

Keith Malinak (01:56:21.538)

Hey, my day job is I'm a judge in Houston. I'm not going to say you'd be good at it because that would be rude. You know, my Nana wanted me to become a judge. What do think of that? My mom wanted me to be a lawyer because you like to argue so much. You could have been in my court, man. That would have been right. And we could have hit each other with bats.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:56:42.478)

Small bat energy.

Keith Malinak (01:56:44.654)

anything online, they're like, no. And they put a hold on it. It's like, what in the hell is wrong with you people?

Keith Malinak (01:57:23.182)

I'm good. You know, my credit card that, I don't know how to explain it. not a credit. This is a debit. okay. So, that's, that's dangerous.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:57:34.2)

I have a debit card and it really pisses me off when I go to the US because everybody wants a credit card, not a debit card.

Keith Malinak (01:57:41.016)

You can use it as a credit card, can't you? Yeah, right? You can just tell him, it as credit. Wait, I thought you were smart.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:57:46.078)

rent a car once and they wouldn't take my debit card.

Keith Malinak (01:57:49.088)

Yeah, I've been there before. I had to actually get a credit card in line. Like, tried. I tried to live a Dave Ramsey, no credit card lifestyle. And then I realized I'm not Dave Ramsey with Dave Ramsey cash. So I was standing in line at the Atlanta airport and rental car line with a debit card. And they're like, no, you have to have a credit card. I literally had to call.

to apply for a credit card while standing in line at the end.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:58:18.88)

for that crispy but you we I am actually protected with my debit card because we have something called digital ID here in Norway and it is I can't go online shopping or anything without me getting in my little cold thingy clicky thing and then password and then password and then so you know,

Keith Malinak (01:58:40.078)

Get your social credit score.

Rebecca Mistereggen (01:58:42.742)

We don't have that stuff.

Keith Malinak (01:58:43.886)

no, sure we don't. It's called our credits. You know, yeah, not that you know. Hey, listen, you should follow Rebecca on X at our Mr. Follow the stuff that she does there. guess if you want to, you can follow at real Brad stags on X. He's a dick. He's a dick. But you know, he's got that daily the Daily Mojo dot com on Saturday morning. He does the the Saturday morning live at 10 a.m. Eastern with Jeff Fisher. Yep.

I get to see Jeffy in person every day. You only get him once a week and it's not even in person. How does that make you feel? Well, tomorrow's International Pillow Fight Day, so it's gonna be a good day. And Rebecca, I swear the payment's on the way, so we can do the whole pillow. It's the thing you advertised. Hey, if you missed the Thursday deep dive yesterday, it was all about Jesus and we're gonna continue that conversation with Dr. Jeremiah Johnston in the future. Don't you worry. And now next week on Wednesday, listen to this, next week's crazy, y'all.

The Wednesday wild card is going to have Steve Friend here, FBI whistleblower. And then Thursday deep dive is going to be all about vaccines, especially childhood vaccines. The vaccine, like Steve Colbert.

like Steve Colbert. No. And then next Friday, we'll see who shows up here. know. Well, I know one of you. know somebody's not going to be here. We'll see who shows up. It could just be me. Wouldn't that be sad? That'd be depressing. Are you going to be naked? If I'm alone and if that's what it takes. That's the right answer. I just I don't know that that's going to.

That's the right answer. I don't think that's going to hold the audience. That's a can-do attitude right there. That's who we're looking for here. you guys want to say before we depart here?

Keith Malinak (02:00:30.114)

But E1 Guru's got it. He is risen indeed. Look at that Easter weekend. Hey, we got Good Friday services tonight. We got Easter Sunday. So be sure to go to your local church, not your mosque. I should hang up now. Have a good weekend everybody.